Last Friday I went to a wedding. It was an enormous amount of fun and just the right amount of perfect for the couple - Emily and Brian. It was one of those weddings that didn't hit any false notes. You could see the bride and groom in all the details. That makes for a pretty much perfect evening. Fun was being had by all but I had to work the next morning so I left earlyish. Got some dancing and silliness in but apparently missed the shank, as it were. That was ok by me cuz I ended up having the most delightful drive home. It was so delightful that it's stayed with me all this week so I thought I'd chat about it.
The wedding was at Hernder Estates which is along the wine route. Anyone who knows me knows that my sense of direction is... flawed. It was a gorgeous night out, about 10 and I figured I could find my way home without resorting to the QEW. I started along a very dark hwy 8 and there were absolutely no cars. It had rained earlier but stopped and the moon was poking out of a cloudy sky. Hwy 8 wanders in and around and up and down... just right. What made the drive so delightful was that it reminded me of another car ride home a couple of years ago. We were coming back from Niagara on the Lake and trying to wend our way down the wine route. Same type of night, quiet, deserted, but clear. So very clear. It was late summer and the stars were losing their minds in the sky. So many thousands trying to elbow their way across this big black sky. My friend was driving and he let me pick every turn. I picked wrong every time. Just plain wrong. Didn't matter... when he stopped the car so we could feast on those stars my flawed sense of direction had brought us to exactly the right place.
I feel like that alot sometimes: taking the wrong turn, picking a direction cuz my gut says "go that way... I'm sure this time" and being wrong again. The wonderful places this flawed sense of direction has taken me to almost makes me weep with gratitude. And the thing is, I always end up home.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Goals
Goals, I'm finding are slippery things.
Having pursued a goal from Jan 1 to Aug 19th I find myself a bit at sea. It feels like it should be easy to just pick a new one and set after it. It's not. Losing the last 15 pounds, exercising on a daily basis, cooking a healthy meal at least 3 times a week... these should be easy peasy goals. Maybe they're just not big enough. They feel pretty mundane after what I've put myself through. More to the point, they're really just an extension of the original goal.
So here's the goal I'm going to pick cuz it is terrifically hard for me and will require skills that I don't currently possess: I'm going to make a phone call. That's it... a simple phone call. During the Project I came to understand that what seems easy and natural for others didn't come easily to me. Really, a row of Oreos for dinner isn't good for you? Eating once a day doesn't help you lose weight? I had alot of "d'oh" moments for sure. Now the act of making a phone call to someone you think you might like who might like you back comes naturally to a large portion of the population. Not to me. Here I am, 50, afraid to make a lousy phone call to a boy. Like most things we're reluctant to do, it's more difficult to do cuz I've built it up in my head. Maybe if I'd had more practise at this it wouldn't be so hard now :)
O.K.... here's the goal: make the stupid phone call. There's no sense bemoaning the fact that you're single if you're not willing to make a dopey phone call that could alter that state. Take some ownership I'd tell somebody else. Alright, "New Goal"... look out - I'm headed your way :)
Having pursued a goal from Jan 1 to Aug 19th I find myself a bit at sea. It feels like it should be easy to just pick a new one and set after it. It's not. Losing the last 15 pounds, exercising on a daily basis, cooking a healthy meal at least 3 times a week... these should be easy peasy goals. Maybe they're just not big enough. They feel pretty mundane after what I've put myself through. More to the point, they're really just an extension of the original goal.
So here's the goal I'm going to pick cuz it is terrifically hard for me and will require skills that I don't currently possess: I'm going to make a phone call. That's it... a simple phone call. During the Project I came to understand that what seems easy and natural for others didn't come easily to me. Really, a row of Oreos for dinner isn't good for you? Eating once a day doesn't help you lose weight? I had alot of "d'oh" moments for sure. Now the act of making a phone call to someone you think you might like who might like you back comes naturally to a large portion of the population. Not to me. Here I am, 50, afraid to make a lousy phone call to a boy. Like most things we're reluctant to do, it's more difficult to do cuz I've built it up in my head. Maybe if I'd had more practise at this it wouldn't be so hard now :)
O.K.... here's the goal: make the stupid phone call. There's no sense bemoaning the fact that you're single if you're not willing to make a dopey phone call that could alter that state. Take some ownership I'd tell somebody else. Alright, "New Goal"... look out - I'm headed your way :)
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Break's over
A cool thing happened today. I got my blog in the mail. There's a company called blog2print that will print your blog and make it into a real live book. Mine arrived today. It's all in there. From day one to day two hundred and thirty. I never actually reviewed my blog while I was writing it. I never went back on day eighty-six and read what I wrote on day twenty-three. Having it all in front of me was a bit of a revelation. I was pretty proud of what I was reading. More to the point, I realized how helpful the writing was to the process.
The writing gave me a place to explore some fairly serious issues for myself. The writing helped me figure out what I was feeling... even on the days when I hated it. And some days I really hated it. Well, it's been a month since the Project finished and I need the writing again. It keeps me focused on the day to day. No big picture stuff... well sometimes... but mostly the daily epiphanies that accumulate into something larger.
Break's over.
The writing gave me a place to explore some fairly serious issues for myself. The writing helped me figure out what I was feeling... even on the days when I hated it. And some days I really hated it. Well, it's been a month since the Project finished and I need the writing again. It keeps me focused on the day to day. No big picture stuff... well sometimes... but mostly the daily epiphanies that accumulate into something larger.
Break's over.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
really? september tomorrow?
Where did it go? I always think of my birthday as the end of summer but, holy crap... this one just flew by. I think because it took forever to get here... remember that hideous April/May?
Still feeling pretty good post Project. I was a tad worried that I'd lose my focus and just turn into a crazy person eating - wise but it turns out I'm pretty even keeled. That said... I'm looking VERY forward to the Ticat game on Monday and all bets are definitely off. Hoping to get fairly stinky drunk :) Always have a plan!
A super cranky man called me on the phone today at work to ask for a "charity" donation then proceeded to ream me out when I told him I couldn't. This guy totally went off on me and I'm not exaggerating when I say it ruined my whole day. I'm just now coming out of it. Gosh, people can be shitty.
I posted a picture of myself on FB to show friend Kate my new blonde hair but what I wasn't expecting was the response from people. People who haven't seen me in a while. Tres gratifying :)
Well, that enough for tonight's little pop in. Stay well out there...
Still feeling pretty good post Project. I was a tad worried that I'd lose my focus and just turn into a crazy person eating - wise but it turns out I'm pretty even keeled. That said... I'm looking VERY forward to the Ticat game on Monday and all bets are definitely off. Hoping to get fairly stinky drunk :) Always have a plan!
A super cranky man called me on the phone today at work to ask for a "charity" donation then proceeded to ream me out when I told him I couldn't. This guy totally went off on me and I'm not exaggerating when I say it ruined my whole day. I'm just now coming out of it. Gosh, people can be shitty.
I posted a picture of myself on FB to show friend Kate my new blonde hair but what I wasn't expecting was the response from people. People who haven't seen me in a while. Tres gratifying :)
Well, that enough for tonight's little pop in. Stay well out there...
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Jack Layton's funeral
I had to work today but I watched most of the ceremony live streamed on my computer in the office. This was prob'ly a mistake. I was in floods for most of it and not of much use to anybody.
I have a great deal of respect for Mr. Layton and was heartened to see the outpouring of emotion from all over Canada. We don't usually do this big, noisy collective grief thing as a rule but I understand the urge. You admired him as a public figure, as a courageous battler against cancer that has taken so many that I don't know of anyone who hasn't been touched by it. You admired him, even if you disagreed with him cuz it seemed true. His passion for what he believed never seemed convenient or wishy- washy. I feel the heartbreak of bringing that party, my party really, right up to the table but cruelly being denied the chance to sit down to dinner.
I have believed for a long time that Jack Layton was a scrappy version of Stephen Lewis. I thought Mr.Lewis' eulogy was as close to perfection as you get. It was rousing, and thought provoking and in your face and touching. My heart went out to Mr. Layton's kids cuz I remember standing there thinking : "here's what I want the world to know about my dad". It was the most difficult and at the same time most rewarding bit of speechifying I've ever done. People later asked me how I didn't break down and I just said: " it was for dad and he'd want me to do good". I thought Jack's kids did good.
We'll go back to the politics "business as usual" and this new NDP will make a heap of mistakes, and look foolish and sometimes get it right. The only hope is that a Stephen (or David for you old timers)Lewis or a Jack Layton will emerge to continue to fight the good fight.
Thank you Mr. Layton for your years of public service. It's time to rest now.
I have a great deal of respect for Mr. Layton and was heartened to see the outpouring of emotion from all over Canada. We don't usually do this big, noisy collective grief thing as a rule but I understand the urge. You admired him as a public figure, as a courageous battler against cancer that has taken so many that I don't know of anyone who hasn't been touched by it. You admired him, even if you disagreed with him cuz it seemed true. His passion for what he believed never seemed convenient or wishy- washy. I feel the heartbreak of bringing that party, my party really, right up to the table but cruelly being denied the chance to sit down to dinner.
I have believed for a long time that Jack Layton was a scrappy version of Stephen Lewis. I thought Mr.Lewis' eulogy was as close to perfection as you get. It was rousing, and thought provoking and in your face and touching. My heart went out to Mr. Layton's kids cuz I remember standing there thinking : "here's what I want the world to know about my dad". It was the most difficult and at the same time most rewarding bit of speechifying I've ever done. People later asked me how I didn't break down and I just said: " it was for dad and he'd want me to do good". I thought Jack's kids did good.
We'll go back to the politics "business as usual" and this new NDP will make a heap of mistakes, and look foolish and sometimes get it right. The only hope is that a Stephen (or David for you old timers)Lewis or a Jack Layton will emerge to continue to fight the good fight.
Thank you Mr. Layton for your years of public service. It's time to rest now.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
back to it
All the paperwork is done and this year's Cactus Fest is a distant memory. I'm some tired but there's a day off looming...
As you can tell by the ticker my weight hasn't budged. I'm making a wee change in the hopes of changing that. The website I use for tracking allots me 1250 cals. per day. That works out to a theoretical loss of 1 lb per week. I've decided to lower that to 1/2 lb a week which allots 1470/ day. I figure a few more of the healthy nutrients goin' in can only help the cause. I was pretty focused towards the end there but as usual the stress of the last couple weeks caused me to under eat. I'm hoping that by jumping back in with both feet food-wise I can shake something loose. Namely a few pounds :)
Still not used to being blonde and CERTAINLY not used to people shouting out "hey blondie". Really? Well I guess it's a slight improvement over "carrot top" which I was forced to put up with in my formative years.
It felt weird to take a couple of days off from the blogging. I think "intermittent" would be the best way to describe it now :) Some things don't change tho... still just blathering ...
ttyl
As you can tell by the ticker my weight hasn't budged. I'm making a wee change in the hopes of changing that. The website I use for tracking allots me 1250 cals. per day. That works out to a theoretical loss of 1 lb per week. I've decided to lower that to 1/2 lb a week which allots 1470/ day. I figure a few more of the healthy nutrients goin' in can only help the cause. I was pretty focused towards the end there but as usual the stress of the last couple weeks caused me to under eat. I'm hoping that by jumping back in with both feet food-wise I can shake something loose. Namely a few pounds :)
Still not used to being blonde and CERTAINLY not used to people shouting out "hey blondie". Really? Well I guess it's a slight improvement over "carrot top" which I was forced to put up with in my formative years.
It felt weird to take a couple of days off from the blogging. I think "intermittent" would be the best way to describe it now :) Some things don't change tho... still just blathering ...
ttyl
Saturday, August 20, 2011
day one ? or where do I go from here...
Yesterday I celebrated with a most excellent group of friends. A very fun birthday :) Part of the fun was not having people recognize me with the new hair colour! Even my own mom...
Speaking of mom, she was being a bit of a trial last night. Pretty much par for the course. One of my friends saw that it was really getting to me and she said: "Cath, let it go - don't make this the hill you die on". What a fantastic way to put it. Immediately things got clearer and easier. God, it's cool to have smart friends.
Ah... where do I go from here? Does there need to be a next big thing , or can I just quietly follow the pursuits I have enjoyed this tremendous year. I think some time off might be warranted. This is really the first birthday I can remember where I haven't thought ok, this year I'm going to dot, dot, dot. I've done all the dot, dot, dots I set out to. I'm sure some overwhelming urge to do something will pop unbidden into my head but for right now I think a little "stay the course" is in order.
Here's a funny... even if you don't read the horoscope I'm gonna bet you pick it up on your birthday. You know the one: if today is your birthday blah blah blah. So I look at mine yesterday and amid all the other stuff it says, you may want to change your approach to diet and exercise. Well Hamilton Spectator syndicated horoscope column... you are day late and a dollar short :)
Speaking of mom, she was being a bit of a trial last night. Pretty much par for the course. One of my friends saw that it was really getting to me and she said: "Cath, let it go - don't make this the hill you die on". What a fantastic way to put it. Immediately things got clearer and easier. God, it's cool to have smart friends.
Ah... where do I go from here? Does there need to be a next big thing , or can I just quietly follow the pursuits I have enjoyed this tremendous year. I think some time off might be warranted. This is really the first birthday I can remember where I haven't thought ok, this year I'm going to dot, dot, dot. I've done all the dot, dot, dots I set out to. I'm sure some overwhelming urge to do something will pop unbidden into my head but for right now I think a little "stay the course" is in order.
Here's a funny... even if you don't read the horoscope I'm gonna bet you pick it up on your birthday. You know the one: if today is your birthday blah blah blah. So I look at mine yesterday and amid all the other stuff it says, you may want to change your approach to diet and exercise. Well Hamilton Spectator syndicated horoscope column... you are day late and a dollar short :)
Thursday, August 18, 2011
day two hundred and thirty
Well... this is it. I made it.
When I wake up tomorrow I'll be 50 years old. Just need to take a minute to process that sentence. OK... i got it :) Tonight I did my last workout as a person in my 40's. EJ was aware of this and decided to work the livin' daylights out of me. It was great. No qualifiers or snarky comments. It was just plain great. Partly because I know the things that he had me do would have been impossible when we started together. I had my assessment with Leslie and the measuring tape doesn't lie. Since I've started I've lost a total of 15 inches. Feelin' pretty chuffed with myself.
Today was full of thinking. Thinking about the Project and all that it means to me. I went to visit my dad today just to be near him. I talk to my dad alot and don't need to be in the cemetery to do it, but it seemed important today. Side note before this becomes too maudlin: there's a gravestone near my dad's that has about the coolest epitaph ever - "don't think it ain't been swell". That one makes me smile every time. Anyway, I just went to hang out and enjoy the peace. My last two birthdays without my dad were bad enough but this one feels especially hurtful. I know, as I have always known that he's proud of me but I don't think the feeling of needing to see them again ever goes away. I miss him daily but I know he gave me the tools to make my own way with integrity and honour and I'm so very grateful for that.
The Project started as a whim kind of idea that blossomed into something real. Part of the reason that happened is because kind people believed I could do it. I said at the beginning that accountability was the driving force behind this blog. Little did I know that the support from so many dear friends would become the real story. Sometimes I feel troubled that I'm single.Kind of ripped off on occasion. On the other hand I know people who are in relationships that don't have the remarkable support system that I do. I've been given the opportunity to open up my field of vision as well as my arms to all kinds of crazy good people. Maybe that wouldn't be the case if I was all "settled down". I'll defer to Sinead O'Connor here and say I do not want what I haven't got. While that's not exactly true I'm damned grateful for what I do have :)
My ticker will change as time beats on. I've learned important things about taking care of myself properly inside and out. I'll continue to try my best. For those of you who stuck it out and read these ramblings I just want to say thanks. It became an endurance test at points, this writing every day but every time somebody said they read it my heart jumped up a little bit. So that's what I mean to say... thanks for making my heart jump up.
I'm at the finish and I don't know how to finish this post. I'll tell you that there are tears. Tears but no sorrow.
So I'm gonna say goodnight. Who am I kidding? I'll be keeping this blog... maybe not as religiously so if yer bored, stop in...
ttyl
When I wake up tomorrow I'll be 50 years old. Just need to take a minute to process that sentence. OK... i got it :) Tonight I did my last workout as a person in my 40's. EJ was aware of this and decided to work the livin' daylights out of me. It was great. No qualifiers or snarky comments. It was just plain great. Partly because I know the things that he had me do would have been impossible when we started together. I had my assessment with Leslie and the measuring tape doesn't lie. Since I've started I've lost a total of 15 inches. Feelin' pretty chuffed with myself.
Today was full of thinking. Thinking about the Project and all that it means to me. I went to visit my dad today just to be near him. I talk to my dad alot and don't need to be in the cemetery to do it, but it seemed important today. Side note before this becomes too maudlin: there's a gravestone near my dad's that has about the coolest epitaph ever - "don't think it ain't been swell". That one makes me smile every time. Anyway, I just went to hang out and enjoy the peace. My last two birthdays without my dad were bad enough but this one feels especially hurtful. I know, as I have always known that he's proud of me but I don't think the feeling of needing to see them again ever goes away. I miss him daily but I know he gave me the tools to make my own way with integrity and honour and I'm so very grateful for that.
The Project started as a whim kind of idea that blossomed into something real. Part of the reason that happened is because kind people believed I could do it. I said at the beginning that accountability was the driving force behind this blog. Little did I know that the support from so many dear friends would become the real story. Sometimes I feel troubled that I'm single.Kind of ripped off on occasion. On the other hand I know people who are in relationships that don't have the remarkable support system that I do. I've been given the opportunity to open up my field of vision as well as my arms to all kinds of crazy good people. Maybe that wouldn't be the case if I was all "settled down". I'll defer to Sinead O'Connor here and say I do not want what I haven't got. While that's not exactly true I'm damned grateful for what I do have :)
My ticker will change as time beats on. I've learned important things about taking care of myself properly inside and out. I'll continue to try my best. For those of you who stuck it out and read these ramblings I just want to say thanks. It became an endurance test at points, this writing every day but every time somebody said they read it my heart jumped up a little bit. So that's what I mean to say... thanks for making my heart jump up.
I'm at the finish and I don't know how to finish this post. I'll tell you that there are tears. Tears but no sorrow.
So I'm gonna say goodnight. Who am I kidding? I'll be keeping this blog... maybe not as religiously so if yer bored, stop in...
ttyl
day two hundred and twenty nine
A most excellent day on the golf course. Glorious weather and I was striking the ball just about as well as I ever had. Some days life is just plain good.
... goodness, I went for a wee break on the couch and now it's 8:30 in the morning. I guess the day took more out of me than I thought :)
Sunshine accompanies my last couple of Project days which is just right. I'm feeling pretty awesome and sunshiney. This Project has been the nicest thing I could have done for myself. I really can't think of a better way to spend eight months. I'm feeling fit and healthy and just plain happy. So many "good todays" strung together and I'm feeling blessed.
Gonna scoot and get on with my day... so much to do :) Ain't it grand !!
... goodness, I went for a wee break on the couch and now it's 8:30 in the morning. I guess the day took more out of me than I thought :)
Sunshine accompanies my last couple of Project days which is just right. I'm feeling pretty awesome and sunshiney. This Project has been the nicest thing I could have done for myself. I really can't think of a better way to spend eight months. I'm feeling fit and healthy and just plain happy. So many "good todays" strung together and I'm feeling blessed.
Gonna scoot and get on with my day... so much to do :) Ain't it grand !!
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
day two hundred and twenty eight
My mini- makeover today was a tremendous success. Yes people, I'm not just blonde, I'm uber blonde. LOVE IT !!! It was a great deal of fun watch the whole process. It was pretty spur of the moment. Started out in the chair with just some lazy talk about how I wanted something completely different and presto... two and a half hours later - I had it.
Just a couple of weeks ago I was contemplating shaving my head. I got this idea that I just wanted to make a fresh start to honour the big b-day. I will admit that I'm glad cooler heads prevailed . I imagine in a couple of days I'll be used to this but right now I honestly feel like a different person. Catching sight of myself in a mirror is odd. Fun, but odd :)
Two days off now then it's Friday and my birthday and the Project is done. It has all come so quickly and awfully slowly at the same time. Off to a golf tournament tomorrow then odds and sods on Thursday. Friday is the start of the Festival then it's just hang on for dear life.
3...2...1...
ttyl :)
Just a couple of weeks ago I was contemplating shaving my head. I got this idea that I just wanted to make a fresh start to honour the big b-day. I will admit that I'm glad cooler heads prevailed . I imagine in a couple of days I'll be used to this but right now I honestly feel like a different person. Catching sight of myself in a mirror is odd. Fun, but odd :)
Two days off now then it's Friday and my birthday and the Project is done. It has all come so quickly and awfully slowly at the same time. Off to a golf tournament tomorrow then odds and sods on Thursday. Friday is the start of the Festival then it's just hang on for dear life.
3...2...1...
ttyl :)
Monday, August 15, 2011
day two hundred and twenty seven
or day one of festival prep. *arghh*
Not much on the Project front tonight. I was so consumed today with all things Cactus Festival that I really haven't had time for any independent thought. The festivals come and they're always a crazy success but holy crap there's alot of "pre" work that goes into them.
I just want to have it on the record that I think Mother Nature is a crazy vengeful bitch. Make of that what you will...
I'm v. excited for my mini- makeover tomorrow. Finally the cut and colour I've been so sorely needing. It will be fun to have kicky hair again. I thought I might have the patience to grow my hair but the heat this summer convinced me otherwise. It may turn out to be a winter project... don't worry I won't keep a blog about it :)
A fairly good start to the last week of the Project but I'm missing the exercise element. Better not lose perspective on that... maybe I'll be able to get out for a lovely bike ride this week. Or at the very least some basement treadmilling. Meeting with EJ on Thurs. and also having my assessment. *gulp* I console myself with the fact that it will never be as horrible as it was the first time :)
Hope yer week started out just the way you needed it to !
Not much on the Project front tonight. I was so consumed today with all things Cactus Festival that I really haven't had time for any independent thought. The festivals come and they're always a crazy success but holy crap there's alot of "pre" work that goes into them.
I just want to have it on the record that I think Mother Nature is a crazy vengeful bitch. Make of that what you will...
I'm v. excited for my mini- makeover tomorrow. Finally the cut and colour I've been so sorely needing. It will be fun to have kicky hair again. I thought I might have the patience to grow my hair but the heat this summer convinced me otherwise. It may turn out to be a winter project... don't worry I won't keep a blog about it :)
A fairly good start to the last week of the Project but I'm missing the exercise element. Better not lose perspective on that... maybe I'll be able to get out for a lovely bike ride this week. Or at the very least some basement treadmilling. Meeting with EJ on Thurs. and also having my assessment. *gulp* I console myself with the fact that it will never be as horrible as it was the first time :)
Hope yer week started out just the way you needed it to !
Sunday, August 14, 2011
day two hundred and twenty six
Ah well... here we are. My last Sunday night. Feeling a bit shattered today but here goes.
The best part of the blogging has been the Sunday nights. Looking forward to the upcoming week, planning, I've liked it a great deal. This is the first Sunday night where I'm thinking backward instead of forward. The reflective mood continues.
I've been thinking about change alot recently . Not just the physical manifestations of the changes I've made (but woot woot about those fer sure) but what , if any , changes have happened inside me. It's possible I'm too close to the process right now but I don't think I've changed very much at all. I've changed the things I do but not the person I am . Some of you may not know this but a long time ago I lost a great deal of weight. It was 20 years ago and I lost 60 pounds. In the succeeding years I put about 30 back on, which actually puts me at the head of the class as far as that annoying statistic about weight gain and loss goes. It was a slow creep those 30 pounds coming back with the last ten arriving within the last 2 or 3 years. Anyway, I remember at the time somebody asking me what caused me to lose the weight. Had I finally hit rock bottom and needed to make a change? Without hesitation I replied, "No. You can't do something right for yourself from rock bottom. You have to finally think that you're worth something to make the change". I thought then, and still think, that you need to be in a place where you've forgiven yourself and you come to the realization that you don't deserve to be ill-treated anymore. All that time I was "protecting" myself with food I was really harming myself. I gave the food too much power over me. Layers of fat can certainly insulate one but it cuts you off from the wrong things. It's ok to feel sad, bored, lonely but it's not ok to cover up those feelings with massive doses of Oreos. At least it's not ok for me.
This blog has been difficult to write because I am, by nature, a very private person. Oh, I'll talk your ear off about anything under the sun as long as it doesn't get down to the me, the me that I don't like folks to look at very long. I was unwilling to share some of the stuff I felt with people I don't know real well. Well, I figure that's a trust issue and since I'm almost done the blog looks like I don't give a rat's ass anymore... in a good way:)
My relationship to food has, indeed, been dysfunctional. I think it always will be. I'm never going to be that person who puts no moral value judgement on ice cream. It will always be me vs the food. I'm ok with that cuz I guess that knowledge will give me the upper hand as I continue on.
Have I changed? Not really. I still worry that I'll bore the hell out of people. That I'm just a half step out of sync with those around me. I know that deep in me I try every day to be the best kind of person I know how to be. That might be trite but it's sincere. I know the worst thing that can happen to me is to stop growing and learning and hoping.
Hope is the thing with feathers...
The best part of the blogging has been the Sunday nights. Looking forward to the upcoming week, planning, I've liked it a great deal. This is the first Sunday night where I'm thinking backward instead of forward. The reflective mood continues.
I've been thinking about change alot recently . Not just the physical manifestations of the changes I've made (but woot woot about those fer sure) but what , if any , changes have happened inside me. It's possible I'm too close to the process right now but I don't think I've changed very much at all. I've changed the things I do but not the person I am . Some of you may not know this but a long time ago I lost a great deal of weight. It was 20 years ago and I lost 60 pounds. In the succeeding years I put about 30 back on, which actually puts me at the head of the class as far as that annoying statistic about weight gain and loss goes. It was a slow creep those 30 pounds coming back with the last ten arriving within the last 2 or 3 years. Anyway, I remember at the time somebody asking me what caused me to lose the weight. Had I finally hit rock bottom and needed to make a change? Without hesitation I replied, "No. You can't do something right for yourself from rock bottom. You have to finally think that you're worth something to make the change". I thought then, and still think, that you need to be in a place where you've forgiven yourself and you come to the realization that you don't deserve to be ill-treated anymore. All that time I was "protecting" myself with food I was really harming myself. I gave the food too much power over me. Layers of fat can certainly insulate one but it cuts you off from the wrong things. It's ok to feel sad, bored, lonely but it's not ok to cover up those feelings with massive doses of Oreos. At least it's not ok for me.
This blog has been difficult to write because I am, by nature, a very private person. Oh, I'll talk your ear off about anything under the sun as long as it doesn't get down to the me, the me that I don't like folks to look at very long. I was unwilling to share some of the stuff I felt with people I don't know real well. Well, I figure that's a trust issue and since I'm almost done the blog looks like I don't give a rat's ass anymore... in a good way:)
My relationship to food has, indeed, been dysfunctional. I think it always will be. I'm never going to be that person who puts no moral value judgement on ice cream. It will always be me vs the food. I'm ok with that cuz I guess that knowledge will give me the upper hand as I continue on.
Have I changed? Not really. I still worry that I'll bore the hell out of people. That I'm just a half step out of sync with those around me. I know that deep in me I try every day to be the best kind of person I know how to be. That might be trite but it's sincere. I know the worst thing that can happen to me is to stop growing and learning and hoping.
Hope is the thing with feathers...
day two hundred and twenty five
I've left this too long tonight and now I'm super tired. Either that or the 3 beers at the Ticat game. These fellas have got to stop with the squeakers... they're killing me.
I'm honestly going to be short and sweet tonight cuz I got nothin'.
These are the worst nights to write cuz I can sit at this keyboard for ever and nothing pops into my head. Drat... nothing
tty tomorrow :)
I'm honestly going to be short and sweet tonight cuz I got nothin'.
These are the worst nights to write cuz I can sit at this keyboard for ever and nothing pops into my head. Drat... nothing
tty tomorrow :)
Friday, August 12, 2011
day two hundred and twenty four
Next Friday... how fast it rushes up to me... *blah*
In the waning days of the Project certain things from the start of the Project flash in my mind. Like, how when I started to tell people my idea mostly their eyebrows shot straight up. Straight up. Then they re-arranged their faces and immediately became supportive. The random guy in the restaurant who insisted; "there's no fuckin' way you'll be able to do that". Well, he was right. I didn't do it. And he was so wrong. I did something bigger, that will last me longer. Funny thing is - he'd be the guy who'd say "see, I was right".
I feel a bit like I've turned my back on the old me. Like I'm saying... see, you really WEREN'T good enough. Hey, old me... you were always good enough. I'm not "better" now I'm just different.
It's odd to me that I haven't read any of this blog except to preview and publish each night. I'm looking forward to sitting down and going through the whole thing. I wonder what it'll be like. There's a cool thing called blog2print that will print and bind your blog. Just like a regular book. I'm gonna get that. This record of whatever this has been deserves it.
In the waning days of the Project certain things from the start of the Project flash in my mind. Like, how when I started to tell people my idea mostly their eyebrows shot straight up. Straight up. Then they re-arranged their faces and immediately became supportive. The random guy in the restaurant who insisted; "there's no fuckin' way you'll be able to do that". Well, he was right. I didn't do it. And he was so wrong. I did something bigger, that will last me longer. Funny thing is - he'd be the guy who'd say "see, I was right".
I feel a bit like I've turned my back on the old me. Like I'm saying... see, you really WEREN'T good enough. Hey, old me... you were always good enough. I'm not "better" now I'm just different.
It's odd to me that I haven't read any of this blog except to preview and publish each night. I'm looking forward to sitting down and going through the whole thing. I wonder what it'll be like. There's a cool thing called blog2print that will print and bind your blog. Just like a regular book. I'm gonna get that. This record of whatever this has been deserves it.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
day two hundred and twenty three
From a super packed day yesterday to a nice quiet today. Lovely.
Had a wonderful lunch with friend Heather at the Thai. It's our preferred lunch spot and the food is wicked. I've been eating out more than normal lately but the great thing is the places chosen really make it easy to make smart decisions.
Back to work tomorrow to start a 5 day stint that will end with 2 days off then the craziness of Cactus Festival. The actual Festival part is really pretty easy... it's the getting there that's tough.
Apparently my brain is working in short, sharp shocks tonight. There's alot going on in the old noodle but it's hard to express it. This is when I wish I was better at this writing thing. I'm not exactly feeling melancholy... more wistful I think. Everything seems to be a bit gauzy around the edges. I know, for certain, that I'm waaaay more sentimental than usual right now. Every kind word or gesture from a friend seems to pierce me. It's like my feelings for everything and everyone are real close to the surface. I wonder how I came to here and how I got so lucky. Just writing about this now makes me well up with gratitude. It's like , just for now, I've lost the ability to be cynical. I know that none of this makes sense but it makes sense in my head.
I guess I'm saying for the next eight days if you see me and smile at me don't be surprised if I burst into tears. Don't be scared just smile and nod :) One week left on the Project and I think it's gonna be a helluva ride...
Had a wonderful lunch with friend Heather at the Thai. It's our preferred lunch spot and the food is wicked. I've been eating out more than normal lately but the great thing is the places chosen really make it easy to make smart decisions.
Back to work tomorrow to start a 5 day stint that will end with 2 days off then the craziness of Cactus Festival. The actual Festival part is really pretty easy... it's the getting there that's tough.
Apparently my brain is working in short, sharp shocks tonight. There's alot going on in the old noodle but it's hard to express it. This is when I wish I was better at this writing thing. I'm not exactly feeling melancholy... more wistful I think. Everything seems to be a bit gauzy around the edges. I know, for certain, that I'm waaaay more sentimental than usual right now. Every kind word or gesture from a friend seems to pierce me. It's like my feelings for everything and everyone are real close to the surface. I wonder how I came to here and how I got so lucky. Just writing about this now makes me well up with gratitude. It's like , just for now, I've lost the ability to be cynical. I know that none of this makes sense but it makes sense in my head.
I guess I'm saying for the next eight days if you see me and smile at me don't be surprised if I burst into tears. Don't be scared just smile and nod :) One week left on the Project and I think it's gonna be a helluva ride...
day two hundred and twenty two
Some days you get lucky. There's the waking up in the morning with nothing special planned and suddenly this wicked day unfolds around you.
Off to Main Cycle to pick up my new bike. Love, love, LOVE my new bike. The Giant it's called so it's really the oxymoron of bikes. It's little... certainly just the right size for me but little. I had forgotten the adrenaline rush of riding around the city on a bike. Close calls aplenty and I had a wicked time.
Next training with Evil Jonny. We're coming to the end of our relationship. Only two more sessions left. I'm not sure why I'm going to miss him but I think I will. He's so far outside of my experience and yet he's like the most delightful puppy. Good training tonight but after a two hour bike ride... I was done.
Do I still have the strength to lift a fork to my mouth? Thankfully yes. A friend called for a spur of the moment "let's go out for dinner". Holy crap... FANTASTIC. If you have the chance, I highly recommend The Alex in Burlington. The food was stupid good. Small plates so there was alot of mixing and matching and just about everything was superb. I'm going to weigh in especially for the scallops and green beans and the mango slaw. Crazy good. As always the best part of a great meal is the company so the evening was pretty much perfect.
Such a whirlwind day from such inauspicious beginnings. Days like this make me wonder ; "hey what could happen tomorrow?" Not knowing is part of the fun :)
Off to Main Cycle to pick up my new bike. Love, love, LOVE my new bike. The Giant it's called so it's really the oxymoron of bikes. It's little... certainly just the right size for me but little. I had forgotten the adrenaline rush of riding around the city on a bike. Close calls aplenty and I had a wicked time.
Next training with Evil Jonny. We're coming to the end of our relationship. Only two more sessions left. I'm not sure why I'm going to miss him but I think I will. He's so far outside of my experience and yet he's like the most delightful puppy. Good training tonight but after a two hour bike ride... I was done.
Do I still have the strength to lift a fork to my mouth? Thankfully yes. A friend called for a spur of the moment "let's go out for dinner". Holy crap... FANTASTIC. If you have the chance, I highly recommend The Alex in Burlington. The food was stupid good. Small plates so there was alot of mixing and matching and just about everything was superb. I'm going to weigh in especially for the scallops and green beans and the mango slaw. Crazy good. As always the best part of a great meal is the company so the evening was pretty much perfect.
Such a whirlwind day from such inauspicious beginnings. Days like this make me wonder ; "hey what could happen tomorrow?" Not knowing is part of the fun :)
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
day two hundred and twenty one
Bought myself a birthday present today. Oh yeah... I am going to be fabulous on my new bicycle!!! I've been wanting one for the longest time and the idea of going to the gym to ride one just makes me groan. Speaking of which I'll be going there tomorrow for a session with E Jonny. Kind of looking forward to it (what??)
Closed tonight so I'm kind of slow and stupid. How was it so busy on an effin' Tuesday night? Cactus Festival is bearing down on us like the freight train it always is. All the beer comes tomorrow... sooooo glad I'm off. I'm going to pick up my new bike... did I mention I have a new bike?
I'm going to sleep now cuz it's like 4:30 in the morning and my brain is turning to mush. Mush I tells ya !! Maybe I'll have something witty and clever to say tomorrow; now... not a chance.
Nighty, night :)
Closed tonight so I'm kind of slow and stupid. How was it so busy on an effin' Tuesday night? Cactus Festival is bearing down on us like the freight train it always is. All the beer comes tomorrow... sooooo glad I'm off. I'm going to pick up my new bike... did I mention I have a new bike?
I'm going to sleep now cuz it's like 4:30 in the morning and my brain is turning to mush. Mush I tells ya !! Maybe I'll have something witty and clever to say tomorrow; now... not a chance.
Nighty, night :)
Monday, August 8, 2011
day two hundred and twenty
Tomorrow I'm in single digits... freaky
Sometimes all you need for a great day is a couple of old friends. Had the most wonderful supper tonight with friend Margie and friend Theresa. They are awesome gals and I think we're lucky that life brought us all back together again. Because of the business I'm in I always say that everybody around me stays 24 and I keep getting older. It's hard to find folks your own age to hang out with. This is where Margie and Theresa have come in. In descending order of age it goes Theresa, Cathy and Margie. There is a year difference at each step. All's fair in love and war cuz last year I was pretty harsh to Tree when she turned and now the payback is on. Marg is playing with fire cuz we'll both turn on her next year :) Ahhh, no friends like old friends !!
Am very excited cuz I was asked to play Legend's next week in a golf tournament. All free, all the time... woot woot. the catch is that I'm going to be playing with people who are far and away above my skill set but luckily it's a scramble and I just might learn something :) Sooooo pumped!!!!
Had best hit the showers now cuz I gotta close tomorrow night and I need to get to the driving range to get some practise in. Hope your week is starting off exactly how you wanted :) ttyl
Sometimes all you need for a great day is a couple of old friends. Had the most wonderful supper tonight with friend Margie and friend Theresa. They are awesome gals and I think we're lucky that life brought us all back together again. Because of the business I'm in I always say that everybody around me stays 24 and I keep getting older. It's hard to find folks your own age to hang out with. This is where Margie and Theresa have come in. In descending order of age it goes Theresa, Cathy and Margie. There is a year difference at each step. All's fair in love and war cuz last year I was pretty harsh to Tree when she turned and now the payback is on. Marg is playing with fire cuz we'll both turn on her next year :) Ahhh, no friends like old friends !!
Am very excited cuz I was asked to play Legend's next week in a golf tournament. All free, all the time... woot woot. the catch is that I'm going to be playing with people who are far and away above my skill set but luckily it's a scramble and I just might learn something :) Sooooo pumped!!!!
Had best hit the showers now cuz I gotta close tomorrow night and I need to get to the driving range to get some practise in. Hope your week is starting off exactly how you wanted :) ttyl
Sunday, August 7, 2011
day two hundred and nineteen
Here we are at the penultimate Sunday. Jeepers.
On this Sunday night I wonder what the Sunday night 2 weeks from now will be like. The frenzy of the Cactus Festival will have wound down and the Project will have been two days completed. I wonder what it's going to be like to be 50. I feel stronger and healthier but there can be no denying that 50 is an absolute demarcation. It's the line in the sand that seemed very far away not too long ago and now it's rushing up to meet me. Tried to talk to Clare Louise about this a little but unfortunately it seemed like the conversation might have veered into being about someone else so that didn't go real well. Her response... "Well how do you think I feel, I'm going to be 80 next year". Not the help I was looking for. *shrug*
Although I regret very little about my life these "big" birthdays none-the-less give me little twinges. At 40 it seemed like I might still have kids, at 50 that's gone. I worry that there won't be anybody left to remember me the way I remember my dad. My dad pops up in my mind very often these days. I've said before I think (know ) he'd be very proud of the Project. He'd find the humour in it, and read it every day. I miss him alot.
I'm awfully lucky and I think I have a great life. The twinges of sadness are just that : twinges. I guess, for me, recognizing what I don't have makes me appreciate what I do. It seems disingenuous to complain about a life so very full of remarkable people. Many years ago I said, " if I'm not going to have an ordinary life, I better try to have an extraordinary one". This Sunday night I'm going to try to remember that sentiment and carry it around with me more.
Have a wicked week everybody.
On this Sunday night I wonder what the Sunday night 2 weeks from now will be like. The frenzy of the Cactus Festival will have wound down and the Project will have been two days completed. I wonder what it's going to be like to be 50. I feel stronger and healthier but there can be no denying that 50 is an absolute demarcation. It's the line in the sand that seemed very far away not too long ago and now it's rushing up to meet me. Tried to talk to Clare Louise about this a little but unfortunately it seemed like the conversation might have veered into being about someone else so that didn't go real well. Her response... "Well how do you think I feel, I'm going to be 80 next year". Not the help I was looking for. *shrug*
Although I regret very little about my life these "big" birthdays none-the-less give me little twinges. At 40 it seemed like I might still have kids, at 50 that's gone. I worry that there won't be anybody left to remember me the way I remember my dad. My dad pops up in my mind very often these days. I've said before I think (know ) he'd be very proud of the Project. He'd find the humour in it, and read it every day. I miss him alot.
I'm awfully lucky and I think I have a great life. The twinges of sadness are just that : twinges. I guess, for me, recognizing what I don't have makes me appreciate what I do. It seems disingenuous to complain about a life so very full of remarkable people. Many years ago I said, " if I'm not going to have an ordinary life, I better try to have an extraordinary one". This Sunday night I'm going to try to remember that sentiment and carry it around with me more.
Have a wicked week everybody.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
day two hundred and eighteen
I think I made a new friend today. That was fun.
I gotta say my get up and go has got up and went. I'm a tired monkey these days. Not really anything to chat about tonight so I'll just wing it.
My new friend seems to be a terrific person who's just too hard on himself. It got me to thinkin' about all the shitty things we say to ourselves... the stuff we wouldn't dream of saying to another person. Maybe the hardest lesson of all is to cut ourselves some slack. The expectations that we heap on ourselves can seem awfully harsh sometimes. How 'bout we practise just giving ourselves the benefit of the doubt. I extend those all the time to people so maybe I deserve it myself. I'm not saying we deserve a free ride. Who else is going to hold me to the standards I've set if not ... me. But sometimes I think it's easy to go over the line and become hyper self- critical. The bad news there is it pushes us to make choices that we might not make otherwise. (All this makes sense in my head so I apologize if it's not translating very well on the page :) )
Anyway... all I'm suggesting is that we spend the next, let's say, 13 days being as kind to ourselves as humanly possible. We deserve it.
I gotta say my get up and go has got up and went. I'm a tired monkey these days. Not really anything to chat about tonight so I'll just wing it.
My new friend seems to be a terrific person who's just too hard on himself. It got me to thinkin' about all the shitty things we say to ourselves... the stuff we wouldn't dream of saying to another person. Maybe the hardest lesson of all is to cut ourselves some slack. The expectations that we heap on ourselves can seem awfully harsh sometimes. How 'bout we practise just giving ourselves the benefit of the doubt. I extend those all the time to people so maybe I deserve it myself. I'm not saying we deserve a free ride. Who else is going to hold me to the standards I've set if not ... me. But sometimes I think it's easy to go over the line and become hyper self- critical. The bad news there is it pushes us to make choices that we might not make otherwise. (All this makes sense in my head so I apologize if it's not translating very well on the page :) )
Anyway... all I'm suggesting is that we spend the next, let's say, 13 days being as kind to ourselves as humanly possible. We deserve it.
Friday, August 5, 2011
day two hundred and seventeen
Laid back, blah kind of day. Woke up late after the close and never really got into my groove. It's around 9:30 and I feel like I pissed away my day off. Oh well... these days happen :)
Nothing much to talk about tonight. Feeling kind of ho hum. Some nights I sit down at the keyboard with nothing to say and stuff just pops up. Some nights not... tonight is that night.
I've said before that the hardest part of the Project has been this. The posting. I almost can't believe that I stuck it out. I tend to be the person who gets inordinately excited about things then just dithers away. I was going to have the BEST garden... I don't. I was going to hang ALL my pictures... I didn't. I could have stopped this after a couple of months and I don't think anyone would have been appalled by me. It became crazy important for me to keep this up just for me. The keeping of this blog has been a personal achievement and I'm very proud of myself. Will I let it go after the 19th? Probably. I may start another blog and not tell anybody where it is. Cuz the truth is... I remember how much I like to write. I remember the thrill of finding the exact word that will make the sentence fall into place. My problem is that, when all is said and done , I'm a performer. I like that people read this and I hope it makes them smile.
The new blog? We'll see...
Nothing much to talk about tonight. Feeling kind of ho hum. Some nights I sit down at the keyboard with nothing to say and stuff just pops up. Some nights not... tonight is that night.
I've said before that the hardest part of the Project has been this. The posting. I almost can't believe that I stuck it out. I tend to be the person who gets inordinately excited about things then just dithers away. I was going to have the BEST garden... I don't. I was going to hang ALL my pictures... I didn't. I could have stopped this after a couple of months and I don't think anyone would have been appalled by me. It became crazy important for me to keep this up just for me. The keeping of this blog has been a personal achievement and I'm very proud of myself. Will I let it go after the 19th? Probably. I may start another blog and not tell anybody where it is. Cuz the truth is... I remember how much I like to write. I remember the thrill of finding the exact word that will make the sentence fall into place. My problem is that, when all is said and done , I'm a performer. I like that people read this and I hope it makes them smile.
The new blog? We'll see...
day two hundred and sixteen
Late tonight... just got in from a close. True to my hope from yesterday I had a nice healthy eating day. Still surprising to me how a day of healthy eating can make me feel soooo good.
Someone mentioned something to me tonight about goals. It started me thinking (natch). What is my goal after this goal. It's kind of a dumb question cuz it presupposes that this Project will be finished, the "goal" so to speak will be accomplished and it's time to move on to the next goal. I don't think things happen like that. I think the thing we set our minds to do: weight loss, regular exercise, learning a new language, being kinder when you can, just becomes something that we have to integrate into our everyday. There can be no "finish". I'm certainly aware that the way I treat my body now needs to be ongoing. Even if I make it to 50 lbs, I can't stop. There is no stopping. This is just how I live my life and how I intend to continue to live it.
Goals can never be finite, at least not the goals I'm most interested in. If I had to use a blanket term for what the Project's goal has been I'd say "self-improvement'. That can never stop. Goals are great and certainly something to strive for so maybe my next goal is not ever being finished trying to make myself better :)
Someone mentioned something to me tonight about goals. It started me thinking (natch). What is my goal after this goal. It's kind of a dumb question cuz it presupposes that this Project will be finished, the "goal" so to speak will be accomplished and it's time to move on to the next goal. I don't think things happen like that. I think the thing we set our minds to do: weight loss, regular exercise, learning a new language, being kinder when you can, just becomes something that we have to integrate into our everyday. There can be no "finish". I'm certainly aware that the way I treat my body now needs to be ongoing. Even if I make it to 50 lbs, I can't stop. There is no stopping. This is just how I live my life and how I intend to continue to live it.
Goals can never be finite, at least not the goals I'm most interested in. If I had to use a blanket term for what the Project's goal has been I'd say "self-improvement'. That can never stop. Goals are great and certainly something to strive for so maybe my next goal is not ever being finished trying to make myself better :)
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
day two hundred and fifteen
The days wind down...
Made an appointment today for my birthday haircut. I was toying with the idea of shaving my head but I couldn't stand to look at one more grimace when I told people :) I'm not even sure I really wanted to shave my head it was more the idea of making a statement. What statement? Not sure about that either. It has to do with starting fresh, and what better physical manifestation of that concept than a shaved head? I have been in talks with my "hair guy" and I think we're going to stick with a kicky cut and a redonkulous colour. Pretty sure...
Need to get myself back on the eating more train. I have been skimping lately not for any other reason than I've just been too hot and tired to eat. I think the last of the weekend's adrenaline finally left my body and I'm just knackered. I imagine the 12 hour shift today didn't help.
Off to hit the showers, then bed. I'm closing tomorrow night so I'll have a good chance to laundry it up and get some groceries in the house. ttyl :)
Made an appointment today for my birthday haircut. I was toying with the idea of shaving my head but I couldn't stand to look at one more grimace when I told people :) I'm not even sure I really wanted to shave my head it was more the idea of making a statement. What statement? Not sure about that either. It has to do with starting fresh, and what better physical manifestation of that concept than a shaved head? I have been in talks with my "hair guy" and I think we're going to stick with a kicky cut and a redonkulous colour. Pretty sure...
Need to get myself back on the eating more train. I have been skimping lately not for any other reason than I've just been too hot and tired to eat. I think the last of the weekend's adrenaline finally left my body and I'm just knackered. I imagine the 12 hour shift today didn't help.
Off to hit the showers, then bed. I'm closing tomorrow night so I'll have a good chance to laundry it up and get some groceries in the house. ttyl :)
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
day two hundred and fourteen
Woot Woot!!! My wizard (awesome bro) showed up first thing this morning and fixed me up :)
I can honestly say I've never been so surprised by anything in my whole life. The trouble that everybody went to in planning that remarkable party still boggles my mind. I can tell you that standing around that table I felt overwhelmed by the sheer amount of love in the room. I'm a very lucky girl to have so many people care that much about me. It's very humbling and TOTALLY awesome :)
Travelling with Brad continues to be the most fun EVAH !!! We're v. lucky that we just happen to fit perfectly as travelling companions. I've travelled with some people I consider good friends but that doesn't always make you well suited for travelling together. For some reason, I think the first trip Brad and I ever took together was to New York and from that time to this we've had some remarkable journeys. I have 7 years to plan for his 50th... no pressure...
According to my countdown clock there are 16 measly days left in The Project. I think I've accomplished alot of what I set out to do. The ticker may not reflect it, but I think 2011 was my year of change. Change that seems to be sticking. I'm very emotional these days and I anticipate that will last for the remaining 16 days. Bear with me folks... we're almost there :)
I can honestly say I've never been so surprised by anything in my whole life. The trouble that everybody went to in planning that remarkable party still boggles my mind. I can tell you that standing around that table I felt overwhelmed by the sheer amount of love in the room. I'm a very lucky girl to have so many people care that much about me. It's very humbling and TOTALLY awesome :)
Travelling with Brad continues to be the most fun EVAH !!! We're v. lucky that we just happen to fit perfectly as travelling companions. I've travelled with some people I consider good friends but that doesn't always make you well suited for travelling together. For some reason, I think the first trip Brad and I ever took together was to New York and from that time to this we've had some remarkable journeys. I have 7 years to plan for his 50th... no pressure...
According to my countdown clock there are 16 measly days left in The Project. I think I've accomplished alot of what I set out to do. The ticker may not reflect it, but I think 2011 was my year of change. Change that seems to be sticking. I'm very emotional these days and I anticipate that will last for the remaining 16 days. Bear with me folks... we're almost there :)
Monday, August 1, 2011
day two hundred and thirteen
Since I'm now home I was absolutely hoping to be posting this from my pc. No such luck. It's taking a sick day... drag. Hopefully my wizard will be able to help me out tomorrow :) I don’t completely hate posting from here but I don’t have super thumb skills so that blows ... mostly the no paragraphs drive me. OK - crazy good weekend and now back to serious Project business. I feel pretty good about choices on the weekend. Lots of booze of course but not a lot of stupid mindless munching. Even turned down street meat :) Thumbs tired now so I'll chat with y'all tomorrow ... hopefully using all my digits :)
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Sunday, July 31, 2011
day two hundred and twelve
At JFK now waiting to return home. I'll fill you in on all the deets of this amazing weekend tomorrow. Manana :)
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day two hundred and eleven
Saturday this is. A tossload of shopping and dinner at Tom Collichio's Craftbar. Tremendous food and service.
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Saturday, July 30, 2011
day two hundred and ten
Such a remarkable day. An amazing Alexander McQueen exhibit at the Met. Creativity for days. A bit overwhelming at times to be honest. A wee nap followed by a truly top 5 dinner at Spice Market. It was like I was tasting those flavours for the first time. Stunning :) Day one of my surprise birthday trip ... super success :)
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Friday, July 29, 2011
day two hundred and nine
No time... I'm on my way to New York !!!
I'll fill you in later... just know that I am humbled and blessed to be friends with some of the greatest people on earth :)
I'll fill you in later... just know that I am humbled and blessed to be friends with some of the greatest people on earth :)
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
day two hundred and eight
So there I was at the Foodcourt in Limeridge Mall. My excellent breakfast had long since worn off and I knew I wasn't getting more food til much later. Still haven't got it as a matter of fact... soon - yummy salad. Anyhoo... there I am just wandering in a sort of foodaholic daze. Chinese, Thai, pizza, oh dear Lord... KFC. I eat KFC about once a year to remind myself that it's about the vilest substance on earth. Would today be the day ? I have honestly never spent so long just aimlessly wandering. Out of the corner of my eye I spot the Subway. 6 inch ham sub on 9 grain with a tossload of veggies and a bottle of water. I swear angels started to sing. That, my friends, is what people in my community call an NSV. Non scale victory. I beat the food court and I feel great. Not to mention I bought a wee little denim skirt and a pair of shorts from my friend Eddie.
A word about my friend Eddie. You may know him as Eddie Bauer. Eddie understands that big girls want to dress well too so he started making his clothes in XXL. Like a 1X in the plus size (least favourite phrase) fashion world. Well, Eddie saw me thru alot of events that I needed nice clothes for, and I appreciate him for that. The last pair of shorts he sold me were a size 18. Today he sold me a pair of size 14. And if I make it to my size 12 goal I'm sure he'll sell me those too :)
A word about my friend Eddie. You may know him as Eddie Bauer. Eddie understands that big girls want to dress well too so he started making his clothes in XXL. Like a 1X in the plus size (least favourite phrase) fashion world. Well, Eddie saw me thru alot of events that I needed nice clothes for, and I appreciate him for that. The last pair of shorts he sold me were a size 18. Today he sold me a pair of size 14. And if I make it to my size 12 goal I'm sure he'll sell me those too :)
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
day two hundred and seven
A good today :)
Surprisingly, working out with EJ was actually fun tonight. Not fun like how may oreo centers can I stuff in my mouth at one time but fun like, Holy Crap I can't believe how strong I'm getting. Some of the stuff is, of course, still ridiculously hard - I lookin' at you plank rows - but I never thought I'd love squats. Goblet squats no less.
Day off tomorrow and theoretically golfing with Robert. I say theoretically cuz I love the guy a ton but he can be pretty flaky. Big weekend off coming up and I have Sunday covered for golf but I'm going to have to go trawling for Monday.
You know those days where you just feel "right"? You're in the right job, hangin' with the right people, just lots of right goin' on. This is the day I'm having. The challenge, I think , is when the days don't go right you have days like this to reach back to and know... o.k. it'll be right again soon enough :) I don't have these days all the time so I'm revelling in this one. Weird part? Nothing really special happened... everything was just... right :)
Surprisingly, working out with EJ was actually fun tonight. Not fun like how may oreo centers can I stuff in my mouth at one time but fun like, Holy Crap I can't believe how strong I'm getting. Some of the stuff is, of course, still ridiculously hard - I lookin' at you plank rows - but I never thought I'd love squats. Goblet squats no less.
Day off tomorrow and theoretically golfing with Robert. I say theoretically cuz I love the guy a ton but he can be pretty flaky. Big weekend off coming up and I have Sunday covered for golf but I'm going to have to go trawling for Monday.
You know those days where you just feel "right"? You're in the right job, hangin' with the right people, just lots of right goin' on. This is the day I'm having. The challenge, I think , is when the days don't go right you have days like this to reach back to and know... o.k. it'll be right again soon enough :) I don't have these days all the time so I'm revelling in this one. Weird part? Nothing really special happened... everything was just... right :)
Monday, July 25, 2011
day two hundred and six
It is seriously fun to come home and hop on the treadmill. Apparently because it's in my basement I've loosened up the dress code considerably. Yep, bra and shorts only. LOVE it !!
Completely unrelated to anything, I just saw a posting on Facebook of 60 portraits of newly married gay couples in New York. So touching. A couple of the photos really bring home how unjust the no gay marriage law was, particularly photos of elderly couples. How long did they have to wait for the state to recognize a long term relationship ? Check out the photos if you have a chance. Other news today that effected me more than I thought it would was Jack Layton's announcement of his leave due to health reasons. Vote for who you want but I don't think anyone can really underestimate Jack's level of passion and commitment. What a wretched turn of events after shepherding the NDP to such great results. Most troubling for me is how he looked at the press conference. Gone was the hale and hearty (and quite frankly sexy) politico, replaced with a terribly frail man. I watched my father waste like that and can only say a prayer for Jack that his journey is full of love and family. He's in my prayers.
I hadn't intended to talk about any of that tonight, but I guess what's on yer mind might as well be on the page:)
Stay well, my friends
Completely unrelated to anything, I just saw a posting on Facebook of 60 portraits of newly married gay couples in New York. So touching. A couple of the photos really bring home how unjust the no gay marriage law was, particularly photos of elderly couples. How long did they have to wait for the state to recognize a long term relationship ? Check out the photos if you have a chance. Other news today that effected me more than I thought it would was Jack Layton's announcement of his leave due to health reasons. Vote for who you want but I don't think anyone can really underestimate Jack's level of passion and commitment. What a wretched turn of events after shepherding the NDP to such great results. Most troubling for me is how he looked at the press conference. Gone was the hale and hearty (and quite frankly sexy) politico, replaced with a terribly frail man. I watched my father waste like that and can only say a prayer for Jack that his journey is full of love and family. He's in my prayers.
I hadn't intended to talk about any of that tonight, but I guess what's on yer mind might as well be on the page:)
Stay well, my friends
Sunday, July 24, 2011
day two hundred and five
If I was better at math I could figure out how many Sundays I've sat down to think about my upcoming week . What I do know is that I only have about three left. Seems impossible that the time has flown this quickly.
Here's the great thing about having wicked friends who need to store stuff in your basement: sometimes some of the stuff is cool. Friend Sara is moving into smaller digs and is storing a bit of her stuff here. Not much really - just bits and bobs. I mean, I could still hold a square dance down there. Two items are of particular interest to me. There's an exercise bike. Yes... interesting enough but... holy crap - a fully tricked out treadmill. Serious business this. All the bells and whistles and oh so much fun. Turns out I will go on a treadmill if it means I can do it in my pj's. Got up this a.m. and right after coffee set off for a 20 minute walk. While I do have a perfectly good dog who also enjoys walking, as I've lamented before, those walks are purely recreational. It's hard to build up any speed with Vito checking the news on every post. It was great fun, very sweaty and seems like something I could repeat.
Which segues me nicely into today's "what should next week look like" segment. The upcoming week should involve lots of cardio, I've got EJ on Tues. for the strength training, and water, water, water. I think I inadvertently did my body alot of good this week with the ridiculous amount of water I took in. Of course, that was just to stave off heat stroke, but I'm pretty sure the agua was the reason for the ticker move :)
Have a wicked week and I'll ttyl :)
Here's the great thing about having wicked friends who need to store stuff in your basement: sometimes some of the stuff is cool. Friend Sara is moving into smaller digs and is storing a bit of her stuff here. Not much really - just bits and bobs. I mean, I could still hold a square dance down there. Two items are of particular interest to me. There's an exercise bike. Yes... interesting enough but... holy crap - a fully tricked out treadmill. Serious business this. All the bells and whistles and oh so much fun. Turns out I will go on a treadmill if it means I can do it in my pj's. Got up this a.m. and right after coffee set off for a 20 minute walk. While I do have a perfectly good dog who also enjoys walking, as I've lamented before, those walks are purely recreational. It's hard to build up any speed with Vito checking the news on every post. It was great fun, very sweaty and seems like something I could repeat.
Which segues me nicely into today's "what should next week look like" segment. The upcoming week should involve lots of cardio, I've got EJ on Tues. for the strength training, and water, water, water. I think I inadvertently did my body alot of good this week with the ridiculous amount of water I took in. Of course, that was just to stave off heat stroke, but I'm pretty sure the agua was the reason for the ticker move :)
Have a wicked week and I'll ttyl :)
Saturday, July 23, 2011
day two hundred and four
Taking a bit of my own advice from yesterday and posting a bit earlier. I certainly feel fresher :)
I had the most amazing dinner tonight. I don't usually go into this kind of detail but I gotta tell you it was crazy good. Pete decided that with the heat and all he's make a cold special for dinner. On spring mix, he's put candied almonds, blueberries, roasted peaches, roasted tomatoes, goat cheese and a ridiculously good honey balsamic vinaigrette. Of course I had to bring one home. It was REDONKULOUS. I tracked it in my MFP and the whole (crazy big, very filling) salad came out to about 200 calories. I mention this because alot of people freak out when they know I (try to ) limit myself to 1250 calories a day. Everybody's got an opinion and the majority on this one is... "it's impossible" or "you're just starving yourself". Quite obviously I'm not starving but more to the point, if you're eating great, healthy, flavourful food you can get in a shitload for not alot of calories. I had a great breakfst today (Dorset muesli and organic yogurt -320 cals) a lovely lunch (our hamburg with no bun and sauteed mushroom - 415 cals) and my terrific dinner (200 cals) So that comes out to 935 cals roughly. That means I have 315 cals left to play with. And I'm gonna !!
There is absolutely a Haagen Daz Ice cream bar in my future :) Holy crap I love healthy eating !!
p.s.... did ya notice the ticker... yep... moved :)
I had the most amazing dinner tonight. I don't usually go into this kind of detail but I gotta tell you it was crazy good. Pete decided that with the heat and all he's make a cold special for dinner. On spring mix, he's put candied almonds, blueberries, roasted peaches, roasted tomatoes, goat cheese and a ridiculously good honey balsamic vinaigrette. Of course I had to bring one home. It was REDONKULOUS. I tracked it in my MFP and the whole (crazy big, very filling) salad came out to about 200 calories. I mention this because alot of people freak out when they know I (try to ) limit myself to 1250 calories a day. Everybody's got an opinion and the majority on this one is... "it's impossible" or "you're just starving yourself". Quite obviously I'm not starving but more to the point, if you're eating great, healthy, flavourful food you can get in a shitload for not alot of calories. I had a great breakfst today (Dorset muesli and organic yogurt -320 cals) a lovely lunch (our hamburg with no bun and sauteed mushroom - 415 cals) and my terrific dinner (200 cals) So that comes out to 935 cals roughly. That means I have 315 cals left to play with. And I'm gonna !!
There is absolutely a Haagen Daz Ice cream bar in my future :) Holy crap I love healthy eating !!
p.s.... did ya notice the ticker... yep... moved :)
Friday, July 22, 2011
day two hundred and three
After 203 days it finally occurred to me that I picked the wrong time of day to write this blog. Too often I feel that I'm complaining how tired I am. Today is no exception.... I'm wiped.
How delightful it is after a hot, exhausting day to come home to AC and complete calm. I went to Zeller's to buy some shorts for work that actually fit me and guess what they're not selling. Shorts. Apparently in Zeller's World if you haven't gotten your shorts by mid April yer not gittin' any. This means I will continue to wander around work for a few days more hiking up my shorts and looking like I'm wearing a tragically full diaper. I did, however, buy a book at Zee's and have been enjoying the quiet and the couch.
It's been much too hot to exercise (right? right?) but boy howdy have I been jamming in the water. This may prove beneficial as I am currently hoping to make that effing ticker move from 25 to 30 in the scant days I have left. Somehow it comforts me to think I can end up at not just halfway but just above halfway. Small victories, I guess, are what keep us pressing on :)
Have a great weekend and for God's sake stay cool and HYDRATE !!!
How delightful it is after a hot, exhausting day to come home to AC and complete calm. I went to Zeller's to buy some shorts for work that actually fit me and guess what they're not selling. Shorts. Apparently in Zeller's World if you haven't gotten your shorts by mid April yer not gittin' any. This means I will continue to wander around work for a few days more hiking up my shorts and looking like I'm wearing a tragically full diaper. I did, however, buy a book at Zee's and have been enjoying the quiet and the couch.
It's been much too hot to exercise (right? right?) but boy howdy have I been jamming in the water. This may prove beneficial as I am currently hoping to make that effing ticker move from 25 to 30 in the scant days I have left. Somehow it comforts me to think I can end up at not just halfway but just above halfway. Small victories, I guess, are what keep us pressing on :)
Have a great weekend and for God's sake stay cool and HYDRATE !!!
day two hundred and two
Here's what's funny... yesterday I thought I was hot. That was not hot. Today was hot. Today was working in a restaurant with malfunctioning air conditioning. Today... today was hot.
I'm still at work and it's still hot. As usual this has impeded my brain function so you might as well stop reading now cuz it's not going to get any better.
My countdown clock keeps counting down. I know that's it's function but it's still slightly alarming. It went so slowly at the beginning and now it's going with the speed of light. *yipes*
I'm still trying to sort out how I feel about the Project being almost done. How I feel about not achieving the set goal. The goal stopped mattering quite awhile ago but I still have a little sigh that I didn't get there.
It's too hot to think about this tonight but I'll be getting back to it soon :)
Stay cool, my friends !!
I'm still at work and it's still hot. As usual this has impeded my brain function so you might as well stop reading now cuz it's not going to get any better.
My countdown clock keeps counting down. I know that's it's function but it's still slightly alarming. It went so slowly at the beginning and now it's going with the speed of light. *yipes*
I'm still trying to sort out how I feel about the Project being almost done. How I feel about not achieving the set goal. The goal stopped mattering quite awhile ago but I still have a little sigh that I didn't get there.
It's too hot to think about this tonight but I'll be getting back to it soon :)
Stay cool, my friends !!
Thursday, July 21, 2011
day two hundred and one
I'm posting from work tonight cuz a) I'm here closing and b) I think by the time I get home my brain will be melted.
Gosh it's been hot here tonight. But that's not news so I'll stop talking about it.
The most wonderful thing that happened today was the appearance of an old friend on my front door (eventually). I don't think my house is hard to find but maybe it is... Anyhoo catching up with Friend Jimmy just lifted my spirit immensely. The kid always makes me smile :)
Even with the heat I did some stellar eating today. Makes me happy. Alright ... gotta stop now cuz the brain is done, overheated, melted to goo... arggggghhhh
Gosh it's been hot here tonight. But that's not news so I'll stop talking about it.
The most wonderful thing that happened today was the appearance of an old friend on my front door (eventually). I don't think my house is hard to find but maybe it is... Anyhoo catching up with Friend Jimmy just lifted my spirit immensely. The kid always makes me smile :)
Even with the heat I did some stellar eating today. Makes me happy. Alright ... gotta stop now cuz the brain is done, overheated, melted to goo... arggggghhhh
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
day two hundred
Well... here I am in the final stretch. 30 days to go.
Got the first real sunburn of the summer today. I've been out in this vicious sun alot but always wearing a golf shirt. Today went out to Myer's pool and kicked it in a bathing suit. You know how easy that is: hanging in the water all day not thinking of the sun jammin' down on ya. Paying for it tonight. Lots of aloe being spread around here.
Mom and I went to Myer's in the first place to see the new baby miniature horse. Yes, the miniature horse (named after an apple I can't remember... not Mac, not Mutsu... anyway) had a baby three days ago (named Abigail, which I don't believe is a type of apple). Smaller than Vito this baby horse is and running around like crazy. So adorable you think your heart might break to look at her :) We swam for awhile then figured we needed some lunch so for a change of pace (and cuz we were close) we went to Copetown Woods. Best grilled salmon avocado wrap evah !! Haven't played there yet but here's a cool thing - the first page of this menu is ALL BROCCOLI. Turns out Mr. Forth is apparently The Broccoli King and the reason the course is so well irrigated is actually cuz there's so much broccoli. Who knew??
So the best part about swimming today was actually the bathing suit part. I'm really quite used to feeling mortified in a suit. These days... not so much. And that feels AWESOME :)
Got the first real sunburn of the summer today. I've been out in this vicious sun alot but always wearing a golf shirt. Today went out to Myer's pool and kicked it in a bathing suit. You know how easy that is: hanging in the water all day not thinking of the sun jammin' down on ya. Paying for it tonight. Lots of aloe being spread around here.
Mom and I went to Myer's in the first place to see the new baby miniature horse. Yes, the miniature horse (named after an apple I can't remember... not Mac, not Mutsu... anyway) had a baby three days ago (named Abigail, which I don't believe is a type of apple). Smaller than Vito this baby horse is and running around like crazy. So adorable you think your heart might break to look at her :) We swam for awhile then figured we needed some lunch so for a change of pace (and cuz we were close) we went to Copetown Woods. Best grilled salmon avocado wrap evah !! Haven't played there yet but here's a cool thing - the first page of this menu is ALL BROCCOLI. Turns out Mr. Forth is apparently The Broccoli King and the reason the course is so well irrigated is actually cuz there's so much broccoli. Who knew??
So the best part about swimming today was actually the bathing suit part. I'm really quite used to feeling mortified in a suit. These days... not so much. And that feels AWESOME :)
day one hundred and ninety nine
Well that's ominous... almost at 200. Almost at the end.
Got to catch up with an old friend today and it was delightful. Not for the first time I'm thrilled when you don't talk to somebody for awhile, then yer gabbing on the phone and it's like you spoke yesterday. This makes me happy :)
Been feeling a little nostalgic lately, I suppose the of the big old birthday coming up. Brad says all the "zero" birthdays come with their own challenges. It's funny, I was a complete mess on my 30th and completely sailed thru my 40th. This one I imagine is going to fall somewhere in the middle . It just doesn't seem all that possible that in a month I'll be "in my fifties". Yeah, yeah 50 is the new 40 but holy crap... it's 50 y'know.
I have been less than diligent about my Project habits for the past few days. For some reason this weekend felt like a celebratory one and I just went with it. I think I'm far enough into the Project now not to freak out about it. It's just a couple a days and if I'm looking for a reality check I'm training with EJ tomorrow. That aughtta do it :)
Got to catch up with an old friend today and it was delightful. Not for the first time I'm thrilled when you don't talk to somebody for awhile, then yer gabbing on the phone and it's like you spoke yesterday. This makes me happy :)
Been feeling a little nostalgic lately, I suppose the of the big old birthday coming up. Brad says all the "zero" birthdays come with their own challenges. It's funny, I was a complete mess on my 30th and completely sailed thru my 40th. This one I imagine is going to fall somewhere in the middle . It just doesn't seem all that possible that in a month I'll be "in my fifties". Yeah, yeah 50 is the new 40 but holy crap... it's 50 y'know.
I have been less than diligent about my Project habits for the past few days. For some reason this weekend felt like a celebratory one and I just went with it. I think I'm far enough into the Project now not to freak out about it. It's just a couple a days and if I'm looking for a reality check I'm training with EJ tomorrow. That aughtta do it :)
Sunday, July 17, 2011
day one hundred and ninety eight
My sporty weekend continues. Today was a Blue Jays game. With the exception of the loss to the Yankees it was pretty much a perfect day. Beer and sunshine is indeed a terrif combination.
It's Sunday so I should be pondering my week but quite honestly I'm a little bit drunk and a whole lotta tired so I don't have much ponderin' in me. I think I want to give it all I've got for the next wee while so I'm gonna focus on that.
I hope y'all are taking advantage of this glorious summer weather. Keep on keepin' on chums :)
It's Sunday so I should be pondering my week but quite honestly I'm a little bit drunk and a whole lotta tired so I don't have much ponderin' in me. I think I want to give it all I've got for the next wee while so I'm gonna focus on that.
I hope y'all are taking advantage of this glorious summer weather. Keep on keepin' on chums :)
day one hundred and ninety seven
Much like drunk dialing, I think blogging is an exercise to avoid when loaded. This is why you're reading a fresh, bright early Sunday morning post instead of a late, drunken post from yesterday.
Osk Kee Wee Wee !! Had a tremendous time at the Ticats game. Gorgeous sunny day and a HUGE win by the Tabbies. Being at Ivor Wynn Stadium is like immersing yourself in the stereotype pool. They're all there for the watching and they all love the Ticats. That's worth the price of admission alone and sometimes it has to be when the boys aren't playing very well. No worries there yesterday. They completely dominated (33-3) and fun was had by all.
So...much...beer!! I had the most excellent time with Friend Pete. We decided kind of organically that this would be a mid-summer celebration of how well work was going. Crazy fun :)
Today it's off to the Jays game to hopefully watch them grab one from the Yankees. I anticipate more beer and more fun. Lucky girl :)
Osk Kee Wee Wee !! Had a tremendous time at the Ticats game. Gorgeous sunny day and a HUGE win by the Tabbies. Being at Ivor Wynn Stadium is like immersing yourself in the stereotype pool. They're all there for the watching and they all love the Ticats. That's worth the price of admission alone and sometimes it has to be when the boys aren't playing very well. No worries there yesterday. They completely dominated (33-3) and fun was had by all.
So...much...beer!! I had the most excellent time with Friend Pete. We decided kind of organically that this would be a mid-summer celebration of how well work was going. Crazy fun :)
Today it's off to the Jays game to hopefully watch them grab one from the Yankees. I anticipate more beer and more fun. Lucky girl :)
Friday, July 15, 2011
day one hundred and ninety six
I'm almost done being tired. I think one more big sleep and that should put an end to it.
Off to the Ticats game tomorrow. V excited. I'm looking forward to a very hot day, with lots of cold beer and a big win from the Tabbies. I think the thing I like best about the way my life runs now is that I don't need to feel guilty about the "cold beer" part. I have integrated this healthy life stuff in such a way that I can include the not so healthy stuff. Just not on so regular a basis as before :)
Went to the driving range after work to practise the things the pro taught me yesterday. I think I'm kinda gettin' it. One thing I do know for sure is that my swing would be less complicated without the boobage. Seriously, the best shots I took tonight were when I was squeezin' the hell out of the girls. (On a side note I wonder if a female golf pro would give me any different pointers *hmmm*) Oh well... if it gets me to 100 I'll try anything :)
Have a great weekend and I'll fill you in on the big win tomorrow.
Off to the Ticats game tomorrow. V excited. I'm looking forward to a very hot day, with lots of cold beer and a big win from the Tabbies. I think the thing I like best about the way my life runs now is that I don't need to feel guilty about the "cold beer" part. I have integrated this healthy life stuff in such a way that I can include the not so healthy stuff. Just not on so regular a basis as before :)
Went to the driving range after work to practise the things the pro taught me yesterday. I think I'm kinda gettin' it. One thing I do know for sure is that my swing would be less complicated without the boobage. Seriously, the best shots I took tonight were when I was squeezin' the hell out of the girls. (On a side note I wonder if a female golf pro would give me any different pointers *hmmm*) Oh well... if it gets me to 100 I'll try anything :)
Have a great weekend and I'll fill you in on the big win tomorrow.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
day one hundred and ninety five
Today I found the wall and hit it. Dear Lord... I feel like a crash test dummy and the airbags did not deploy. Too much going on and not enough sleep. I'm all good with that cuz it's summer and all and it should be busy but my body just said nope... not doin' it.
I had to cut my training with EJ short tonight cuz I was so tired and unfocused I actually hurt my shoulder. Not a big hurt but big enough to realize that I was capable of injuring myself tonight so it was time to stop. Maybe the wisdom of age is knowing that altho your ego wants to power thru the sensible part of your brain is the one you should be listening to... so I did.
In exciting news I get to have my first hot bath in weeks tonight. When I returned home central air was pulsing thru my house so I'm actually a little bit cold. *giggle* I'll reset it to a sensible temp but the fellas left it at 71 so I'm actually going to luxuriate in a delightful hot bath before going to bed and curling up in my duvet. Glorious :)
I had to cut my training with EJ short tonight cuz I was so tired and unfocused I actually hurt my shoulder. Not a big hurt but big enough to realize that I was capable of injuring myself tonight so it was time to stop. Maybe the wisdom of age is knowing that altho your ego wants to power thru the sensible part of your brain is the one you should be listening to... so I did.
In exciting news I get to have my first hot bath in weeks tonight. When I returned home central air was pulsing thru my house so I'm actually a little bit cold. *giggle* I'll reset it to a sensible temp but the fellas left it at 71 so I'm actually going to luxuriate in a delightful hot bath before going to bed and curling up in my duvet. Glorious :)
day one hundred and ninety four
Just realized I'm closing in on day 200. Weird :)
Nothing too exciting to report. It's just past 4 a.m. and I've been home from work about an hour. Theoretically I should be in bed cuz I have AC coming tomorrow at 8:30. Oh yeah baby... me and the livestock will officially have air conditioning tomorrow. I'm pretty pumped. Then off to a golf lesson, then off to train with EJ. And I'm not asleep because....
I'm hoping the cooking bug will bite me again soon. Not gonna lie... I've been pretty lazy about the cooking lately. I went thru an adventurous streak and now that's gone kaput. I think the most difficult part of the Project has been the cooking. I understand how important it is to the process but I just don't dig it. This recent hot weather hasn't helped my efforts any. Also, the work sched has been a bit crazy. All valid excuses I think but really, just excuses. I try not to beat myself up too much about anything that has to do with the Project but this is just one thing I know I could (and should) do better.
O.K., the birds are singing full on now so I'm definitely hitting the sheets. ttyl :)
Nothing too exciting to report. It's just past 4 a.m. and I've been home from work about an hour. Theoretically I should be in bed cuz I have AC coming tomorrow at 8:30. Oh yeah baby... me and the livestock will officially have air conditioning tomorrow. I'm pretty pumped. Then off to a golf lesson, then off to train with EJ. And I'm not asleep because....
I'm hoping the cooking bug will bite me again soon. Not gonna lie... I've been pretty lazy about the cooking lately. I went thru an adventurous streak and now that's gone kaput. I think the most difficult part of the Project has been the cooking. I understand how important it is to the process but I just don't dig it. This recent hot weather hasn't helped my efforts any. Also, the work sched has been a bit crazy. All valid excuses I think but really, just excuses. I try not to beat myself up too much about anything that has to do with the Project but this is just one thing I know I could (and should) do better.
O.K., the birds are singing full on now so I'm definitely hitting the sheets. ttyl :)
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
day one hundred and ninety three
It seems that the never ending day has finally ended. Wow... that was long.
I don't know how people commute. I had to travel to Brampton today, wait for 21/2 hours and then return to work. Where it was crazy busy. And the A/C quit. And I left the lid of the thing I got fixed in Brampton in Brampton. Bummer.
On the up side I'm v. excited that I finally have my golf lesson on Thurs. Hopefully this will put me on the road to iron recovery. AND I should have air conditioning in the house by next week. I've never put all that much stock in AC for the home. I grew up without it but holy crap... it's just hotter now. Also the nice folks from Environment Canada are calling for this to go on for the next three months. *gasp* So AC it is :)
Off to the showers and I'll catch y'all tomorrow. I'm closing so my ramblings may be comin' from the Cactus... ttyl :)
I don't know how people commute. I had to travel to Brampton today, wait for 21/2 hours and then return to work. Where it was crazy busy. And the A/C quit. And I left the lid of the thing I got fixed in Brampton in Brampton. Bummer.
On the up side I'm v. excited that I finally have my golf lesson on Thurs. Hopefully this will put me on the road to iron recovery. AND I should have air conditioning in the house by next week. I've never put all that much stock in AC for the home. I grew up without it but holy crap... it's just hotter now. Also the nice folks from Environment Canada are calling for this to go on for the next three months. *gasp* So AC it is :)
Off to the showers and I'll catch y'all tomorrow. I'm closing so my ramblings may be comin' from the Cactus... ttyl :)
Monday, July 11, 2011
day one hundred and ninety two
It might just be too hot to think. I know it's not that hot but it's really stuffy in my little office cuz I put the desk in front of the window and, quite cleverly... I can't reach the window *arghh*
Good day today food-wise but I got diverted from the gym after work. I think if I was dedicated enough nothing could divert me but, alas, such is not the case.
The only thing for it is a ridiculously cold shower and straight to bed. Hot makes me tired. And no, I do not want any cheese with my whine... I'm counting calories :)
Good day today food-wise but I got diverted from the gym after work. I think if I was dedicated enough nothing could divert me but, alas, such is not the case.
The only thing for it is a ridiculously cold shower and straight to bed. Hot makes me tired. And no, I do not want any cheese with my whine... I'm counting calories :)
Sunday, July 10, 2011
day one hundred and ninety one
Ahhhh, Sunday :)
Had a terrific day. Even with some questionable, verging on tragic, golf shots I managed to record a new personal best. 108 !! Pretty effin' pleased with myself, I gotta tell ya. Can 105 be far behind?
After that I scooted to mom's for Chinese takeout. Since I went the entire day on one measly granola bar I was pretty hungry. I'm not sure I ever remember Chinese food tasting so good. And (woot woot) I have leftover beef and broccoli for lunch tomorrow. During strawberry season mom makes the most glorious cake. Did she have one made? Yes she did! Did I enjoy the hell out of it? But of course. (Add a cheesy French accent there would ya? )
I'm not sure I've mentioned this before but I told my mom that for my birthday I'd like her to pick out her favourite photo of me and have it framed. Because my mother is incapable of holding on to her biggest surprises ... there is an actual physical danger she will burst... she presented me with said photo tonight. It is a black and white photo of my dad and me. I'm probly 2 years old and my dad is reaching down to steady me. We must be heading to church cuz Dad is lookin' sharp and I'm wearing a dress with a wee hat, patent leather shoes and white gloves. Needless to say... I was in floods.
With 39 days left in the Project I was thinking this week's goal might as well be to hit it as hard as humanly possible. Why not? I have come to understand that what started as a little fun thing won't stop on Aug. 19th. That said... since I've only got 39 days left - why not give 'er??
Have a tremendous week everybody and keep on keepin' on :)
Had a terrific day. Even with some questionable, verging on tragic, golf shots I managed to record a new personal best. 108 !! Pretty effin' pleased with myself, I gotta tell ya. Can 105 be far behind?
After that I scooted to mom's for Chinese takeout. Since I went the entire day on one measly granola bar I was pretty hungry. I'm not sure I ever remember Chinese food tasting so good. And (woot woot) I have leftover beef and broccoli for lunch tomorrow. During strawberry season mom makes the most glorious cake. Did she have one made? Yes she did! Did I enjoy the hell out of it? But of course. (Add a cheesy French accent there would ya? )
I'm not sure I've mentioned this before but I told my mom that for my birthday I'd like her to pick out her favourite photo of me and have it framed. Because my mother is incapable of holding on to her biggest surprises ... there is an actual physical danger she will burst... she presented me with said photo tonight. It is a black and white photo of my dad and me. I'm probly 2 years old and my dad is reaching down to steady me. We must be heading to church cuz Dad is lookin' sharp and I'm wearing a dress with a wee hat, patent leather shoes and white gloves. Needless to say... I was in floods.
With 39 days left in the Project I was thinking this week's goal might as well be to hit it as hard as humanly possible. Why not? I have come to understand that what started as a little fun thing won't stop on Aug. 19th. That said... since I've only got 39 days left - why not give 'er??
Have a tremendous week everybody and keep on keepin' on :)
Saturday, July 9, 2011
day one hundred and ninety
40 days left *gulp*
How can there possibly be only forty days left til I turn 50. 20 minutes ago I was 30 the instant before that I was 13. Holy crap. I think there's a blog post in my future where I wax philosophic but not tonight. Not tonight.
Quiet day at work followed by a dismal nine holes of golf. Dismal I tells ya :( The only bright spot is that my driver now has a wonderful new tiger paw cover. This truly makes up for a variety of ills. Golfing at a new course tomorrow and hopefully I'll have some zing back in my swing. Don't think I could stand an entire 18 holes of that nonsense.
Off to shower and clean my golf shoes. At least I can look good, right :)
How can there possibly be only forty days left til I turn 50. 20 minutes ago I was 30 the instant before that I was 13. Holy crap. I think there's a blog post in my future where I wax philosophic but not tonight. Not tonight.
Quiet day at work followed by a dismal nine holes of golf. Dismal I tells ya :( The only bright spot is that my driver now has a wonderful new tiger paw cover. This truly makes up for a variety of ills. Golfing at a new course tomorrow and hopefully I'll have some zing back in my swing. Don't think I could stand an entire 18 holes of that nonsense.
Off to shower and clean my golf shoes. At least I can look good, right :)
day one hundred and eighty nine
I often joke that I'm getting older and the people I work with are perpetually 23. What I mean , of course, is that my working life has been spent for a very long time in the company of servers.
They are a fascinating breed of people. Sometimes I think their collective noun would be "whine": a herd of cows, a school of fish, a whine of servers. I was one of these people so I know of what I speak :) The most remarkable thing about them, tho, is that by and large they're working as servers to fund some other passion. I have seen kids become teachers, performers, butchers, bakers and candlestick makers. Many find their passion in being terrific moms and dads.
Last night I had the privilege of attending an art opening for one of my current servers. Lara is a gifted photographer and she had a show at the James St. Art Crawl. It was wonderful. I'm always so proud that I get to play a (small) part in helping these kids pursue what they love.
On a side note... if you haven't been to the James St. Art Crawl, it happens every second Friday and it's awesome. G'wan down there :)
They are a fascinating breed of people. Sometimes I think their collective noun would be "whine": a herd of cows, a school of fish, a whine of servers. I was one of these people so I know of what I speak :) The most remarkable thing about them, tho, is that by and large they're working as servers to fund some other passion. I have seen kids become teachers, performers, butchers, bakers and candlestick makers. Many find their passion in being terrific moms and dads.
Last night I had the privilege of attending an art opening for one of my current servers. Lara is a gifted photographer and she had a show at the James St. Art Crawl. It was wonderful. I'm always so proud that I get to play a (small) part in helping these kids pursue what they love.
On a side note... if you haven't been to the James St. Art Crawl, it happens every second Friday and it's awesome. G'wan down there :)
Friday, July 8, 2011
day one hundred and eighty eight
Oops... lost a day. Laid down on the couch last night and slipped into a wee coma. Woke up just in time to shuffle myself off to bed. Guess I needed some sleep :)
Here's the question of the day anyway... where do fruit flies go? I put some strawberries out on the counter and went outside to play with Vito. When I returned (say a half hour later) there were fruit flies everywhere. I cleaned up the area, put the strawberries in the fridge and wandered off to check something on the computer. Came back into the kitchen seriously ten minutes later and the fruit flies were gone. Just disappeared... where did they go? And where are they hiding that they can appear so quickly once the fruit is left out. It's kinda creepy.
Looks to be another scorcher of a day so off for a cool shower then to work. One of my staff is having some work in tonight's art crawl and I'm looking forward to seeing it . This is why I love servers. They are quirky people who tend to have some other passion that the serving job pays for. How cool is that :)
Here's the question of the day anyway... where do fruit flies go? I put some strawberries out on the counter and went outside to play with Vito. When I returned (say a half hour later) there were fruit flies everywhere. I cleaned up the area, put the strawberries in the fridge and wandered off to check something on the computer. Came back into the kitchen seriously ten minutes later and the fruit flies were gone. Just disappeared... where did they go? And where are they hiding that they can appear so quickly once the fruit is left out. It's kinda creepy.
Looks to be another scorcher of a day so off for a cool shower then to work. One of my staff is having some work in tonight's art crawl and I'm looking forward to seeing it . This is why I love servers. They are quirky people who tend to have some other passion that the serving job pays for. How cool is that :)
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
day one hundred and eighty seven
Not a heck of a lot today.
Busywork at work, if that makes any sense. Busywork is what you do when there aren't alot of guests around. Today's busywork was that I purchased a new washer we desperately needed. Bought and delivered on the same day... damn I'm good.
Too hot to eat today so bologna sandwiches for all. Couldn't even organize a salad *shrug* Ah well, tomorrow brings fresh chances to do right :)
Sleep now... ttyl
Busywork at work, if that makes any sense. Busywork is what you do when there aren't alot of guests around. Today's busywork was that I purchased a new washer we desperately needed. Bought and delivered on the same day... damn I'm good.
Too hot to eat today so bologna sandwiches for all. Couldn't even organize a salad *shrug* Ah well, tomorrow brings fresh chances to do right :)
Sleep now... ttyl
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
day one hundred and eighty six
Today I went to purchase a new golf outfit. Mostly because I had money left on a gift card but also cuz I loves me some cute golf clothes. (sidenote: how come I feel perfectly cute in a golf skirt but would never dream of wearing a skirt that short at any other time... hmmm) So, let me tell you how uplifting it is to go into Golftown, pick up a size 14 and not wonder if it's going to fit :) Well, I kinda wonder but what I'm wondering is... will it be a bit too loose *insane giggle* Yep, fabulous new golf skirt (and maybe matching top *wink wink*) came home with me :)
Worked out with EJ tonight and it was almost fun... almost. It turns out that I'm sort of an odd worker outer. Seems that the rest of his clients get less strong on the final reps. Turns out I get more strong. Even did extra stuff tonight cuz I could. Go figure...
Feelin' really good these days. I guess it might just be summer finally arriving. Just strongly feeling all of the blessings that are in my life. The straight up blessings and the ones I have to dig a little deeper to find. Feels like it's all coming together *contented sigh*
Worked out with EJ tonight and it was almost fun... almost. It turns out that I'm sort of an odd worker outer. Seems that the rest of his clients get less strong on the final reps. Turns out I get more strong. Even did extra stuff tonight cuz I could. Go figure...
Feelin' really good these days. I guess it might just be summer finally arriving. Just strongly feeling all of the blessings that are in my life. The straight up blessings and the ones I have to dig a little deeper to find. Feels like it's all coming together *contented sigh*
Monday, July 4, 2011
day one hundred and eighty five
Sometimes something unexpected happens.
I was excited to golf (again) today and was going to a new course. That's a bit of apprehension for me cuz I always wonder... will it be nice, in good shape, harder than I could possibly handle? Then there's the pairing up with two complete strangers for the next 41/2 to 5 hours of your life. Are they going to be really good, which will mortify me cuz I hate the idea of holding anybody back. Ya see... for you non-golfers there's alot of thought that goes into this. Well - that part might just be me *shrug*. Anyhoo, off we went to play Brant Valley and it was absolutely grand. The course is gorgeous, in fairly good shape (mother Nature has been pretty vile to most of the localish courses) and not too crazy hard for me. The most pleasant surprise was the couple we were paired with : lovely people. Also handy that they had played this geographically tricky course before and could fill us in. They were delightful.
So... it's just before 11 and I'm blogging. This is pretty much my normal blog time but there's a difference. I'm at work tonight and I'm holding on to the "wake" state by the slimmest of threads. I thought the blogging might keep me awake. But now I'm almost done this post and will have another 2 hours to try and maintain consciousness... wish...me...luck :) That said, I wouldn't trade a terrific day of golf for some silly old not tired-ness... it's all good :)
I was excited to golf (again) today and was going to a new course. That's a bit of apprehension for me cuz I always wonder... will it be nice, in good shape, harder than I could possibly handle? Then there's the pairing up with two complete strangers for the next 41/2 to 5 hours of your life. Are they going to be really good, which will mortify me cuz I hate the idea of holding anybody back. Ya see... for you non-golfers there's alot of thought that goes into this. Well - that part might just be me *shrug*. Anyhoo, off we went to play Brant Valley and it was absolutely grand. The course is gorgeous, in fairly good shape (mother Nature has been pretty vile to most of the localish courses) and not too crazy hard for me. The most pleasant surprise was the couple we were paired with : lovely people. Also handy that they had played this geographically tricky course before and could fill us in. They were delightful.
So... it's just before 11 and I'm blogging. This is pretty much my normal blog time but there's a difference. I'm at work tonight and I'm holding on to the "wake" state by the slimmest of threads. I thought the blogging might keep me awake. But now I'm almost done this post and will have another 2 hours to try and maintain consciousness... wish...me...luck :) That said, I wouldn't trade a terrific day of golf for some silly old not tired-ness... it's all good :)
Sunday, July 3, 2011
day one hundred and eighty four.
I gotta say... this has been the most pleasant holiday weekend I've had in a long time :)
Golf today was spectacular. The weather was superb and the company was grand. Did I shoot my 110? Ummm... kinda, sorta. See - I TOTALLY did if you don't count the penalties. I had about 7 of the little effers so my final score was 117. Interesting tho... usually I have a pretty good front nine and fall to bits on the back. Today I actually shaved a stroke off on the back. Woot woot... LPGA card here I come. Is there a Champions tour for the gals ??
In keeping with the Project I just gotta say that golfing is the most excellent way to get the exercise. According to my MFP I burned something like 1200 calories (pulling clubs) and I'm all good with that. Makes me feel a tad less guilty about the 2 1/2 pints of Rolling Rock :)
More golf tomorrow before my close shift. That will be interesting :)
Here it is Sunday which is the night I generally ponder the week ahead. Last week's goal turned out to be so much fun I think I'll just repeat it... and I quote... So this week's goal? Enjoy! That's it... just enjoy the way my life unfolds and make sure I'm present for the whole thing :)
Alright kittens... off we go !!!
Golf today was spectacular. The weather was superb and the company was grand. Did I shoot my 110? Ummm... kinda, sorta. See - I TOTALLY did if you don't count the penalties. I had about 7 of the little effers so my final score was 117. Interesting tho... usually I have a pretty good front nine and fall to bits on the back. Today I actually shaved a stroke off on the back. Woot woot... LPGA card here I come. Is there a Champions tour for the gals ??
In keeping with the Project I just gotta say that golfing is the most excellent way to get the exercise. According to my MFP I burned something like 1200 calories (pulling clubs) and I'm all good with that. Makes me feel a tad less guilty about the 2 1/2 pints of Rolling Rock :)
More golf tomorrow before my close shift. That will be interesting :)
Here it is Sunday which is the night I generally ponder the week ahead. Last week's goal turned out to be so much fun I think I'll just repeat it... and I quote... So this week's goal? Enjoy! That's it... just enjoy the way my life unfolds and make sure I'm present for the whole thing :)
Alright kittens... off we go !!!
day one hundred and eighty three
On nights when I close the day seems a bit of a blur.
Think it was a good day... not much exercise but good on the eating front. I'm pretty excited to play golf tomorrow and fingers crossed it will be the first dry day I've been out this season.
It certainly was summer today. Prob'ly not good karma to complain about the heat since I complained so hard about the cold and wet. Hoping that the performances of earlier have not been a fluke. It would make me crazy happy to shoot 110. Here's hoping :)
Enjoy the last bit of yer holiday weekend !!
Think it was a good day... not much exercise but good on the eating front. I'm pretty excited to play golf tomorrow and fingers crossed it will be the first dry day I've been out this season.
It certainly was summer today. Prob'ly not good karma to complain about the heat since I complained so hard about the cold and wet. Hoping that the performances of earlier have not been a fluke. It would make me crazy happy to shoot 110. Here's hoping :)
Enjoy the last bit of yer holiday weekend !!
Friday, July 1, 2011
day one hundred and eighty two
So I'm driving home from a very busy Canada Day, pull into my driveway and realize that I have a perfect view of the Bayfront Fireworks from my front lawn. It was like a wee bonus on top of the already terrifically fun Canada Day festivities.
Friend Theresa's party was alot of fun. Very nice folks and decorated exactly the way you'd want. Very high cheese factor but very sincere. It makes my heart big. The party at the Cactus was also terrific with lots of great energy. A good time.
Closing tomorrow night so I get to have a bit of a lie in. I forgot I was closing so I did all of my yardwork today, which means I can sit out the back tomorrow with my paper and my coffee and not be appalled by the state of the lawn. Woot woot :)
Hope you've all had a tremendous Canada Day and got your own version of bonus fireworks !!
Friend Theresa's party was alot of fun. Very nice folks and decorated exactly the way you'd want. Very high cheese factor but very sincere. It makes my heart big. The party at the Cactus was also terrific with lots of great energy. A good time.
Closing tomorrow night so I get to have a bit of a lie in. I forgot I was closing so I did all of my yardwork today, which means I can sit out the back tomorrow with my paper and my coffee and not be appalled by the state of the lawn. Woot woot :)
Hope you've all had a tremendous Canada Day and got your own version of bonus fireworks !!
Thursday, June 30, 2011
day one hundred and eighty one
Waiting for my nephew to show up with the couches he wants to store in my basement. It's after 11 p.m. I am too old for the shenanigans of the young...
So much excitement for the last few days and I'm tuckered. Long day at work today making sure stuff is ready for tomorrow... mostly I want to sack out.
Looking forward to loads of fun both at Friend Theresa's Canada Day Party and our own shin-dig. Also the prospect of golf on Sunday - woot woot :)
Happy Canada Day y'all :)
So much excitement for the last few days and I'm tuckered. Long day at work today making sure stuff is ready for tomorrow... mostly I want to sack out.
Looking forward to loads of fun both at Friend Theresa's Canada Day Party and our own shin-dig. Also the prospect of golf on Sunday - woot woot :)
Happy Canada Day y'all :)
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
day one hundred and eighty
Yep, this has shaped up to be one terrific week :)
Just returned from the best evening with my oldest friend. We don't get to see each other near enough but we pick up like it was just last week. Forty years later she still walks too fast and I still walk too slow. Funny how the old patterns re-emerge in these two people who are now completely different from those two 10 year olds but still fundamentally the same. We were lucky to have found each other but in this crazy mixed up world of "adult" hood we're luckier again cuz we still manage to find each other. More importantly, we set a date for our trip to celebrate, commiserate and contemplate that we're turning 50. (She turned in Feb. so is waaaaay older than me ) Off to New York in November!!!!
If I haven't told you already - you really need to go to Acclamation for their gumbo. Not sure why they call it gumbo cuz, well, it isn't, but still... it rocks my world :)
Hope y'all are keepin' on keepin' on... ttyl :)
Just returned from the best evening with my oldest friend. We don't get to see each other near enough but we pick up like it was just last week. Forty years later she still walks too fast and I still walk too slow. Funny how the old patterns re-emerge in these two people who are now completely different from those two 10 year olds but still fundamentally the same. We were lucky to have found each other but in this crazy mixed up world of "adult" hood we're luckier again cuz we still manage to find each other. More importantly, we set a date for our trip to celebrate, commiserate and contemplate that we're turning 50. (She turned in Feb. so is waaaaay older than me ) Off to New York in November!!!!
If I haven't told you already - you really need to go to Acclamation for their gumbo. Not sure why they call it gumbo cuz, well, it isn't, but still... it rocks my world :)
Hope y'all are keepin' on keepin' on... ttyl :)
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
day one hundred and seventy nine
A most excellent today !!!
Ridiculous amount of fun at the golf tournament. The weather was stellar (ok 10 minutes of rain) and the course was in beautiful shape. I had another day whee I just couldn't seem to hit the ball wrong. It was AWESOME :) It was a shotgun start so we started on hole 9. The ladies longest drive was hole 10. A little disappointing cuz that's not alot of time to warm up. I stepped up, took a deep breath and cracked a wicked drive 170 yds straight down the fairway. Now comes the hard part. Will that glorious drive hold up for the rest of the day? There are 25 or so more foursomes to go thru there and lots of gals. Long story short - YES! YES! YES! It held up all day. I took Ladies longest drive. V. happy - over the moon as it were. I'm still pretty thrilled...
If you have ever golfed with Friend Brad and I, you know a main component of the day is golf cart snacks. Usually it's a conglomerate of candy, chips, and all sorts of nasty things. Well, there were the pre-requisite nasty things (Twizzlers and hot pepperettes) but this year we also had raw almonds, fresh watermelon and blueberries. It was nice to be able to snack out on healthy treats.
Looking forward to tomorrow and hanging with my oldest friend. Ahhhh this is turning into a great week :)
Ridiculous amount of fun at the golf tournament. The weather was stellar (ok 10 minutes of rain) and the course was in beautiful shape. I had another day whee I just couldn't seem to hit the ball wrong. It was AWESOME :) It was a shotgun start so we started on hole 9. The ladies longest drive was hole 10. A little disappointing cuz that's not alot of time to warm up. I stepped up, took a deep breath and cracked a wicked drive 170 yds straight down the fairway. Now comes the hard part. Will that glorious drive hold up for the rest of the day? There are 25 or so more foursomes to go thru there and lots of gals. Long story short - YES! YES! YES! It held up all day. I took Ladies longest drive. V. happy - over the moon as it were. I'm still pretty thrilled...
If you have ever golfed with Friend Brad and I, you know a main component of the day is golf cart snacks. Usually it's a conglomerate of candy, chips, and all sorts of nasty things. Well, there were the pre-requisite nasty things (Twizzlers and hot pepperettes) but this year we also had raw almonds, fresh watermelon and blueberries. It was nice to be able to snack out on healthy treats.
Looking forward to tomorrow and hanging with my oldest friend. Ahhhh this is turning into a great week :)
Monday, June 27, 2011
day one hundred and seventy eight
Three more great words : golf tournament tomorrow :) If y'all could just send out some "no rain" vibes that would be super. I don't mind cloudy, I don't mind overcast - just please NO RAIN.
The trainer from my gym called me today (not EJ) but Lesley the assessment gal. Before when she did my check up she couldn't find my original paperwork. Oh well... we just kind of winged it. Today she found it and wanted to call to tell me I had , in fact, lose 81/2 inches. Not all in one place mind you *giggle* but eight and one half inches off my person. Pretty cool, eh?
I want to talk about lots of interesting things but there's a voice in my head just humming a wee song that goes something klike' "golf, golf, golfie golf" so I can't really come up with anything. I think I need to be done.
I'll talk to y'all tomorrow with something clever and pithy but right now... I gotta go clean my golf shoes :)
ttyl
The trainer from my gym called me today (not EJ) but Lesley the assessment gal. Before when she did my check up she couldn't find my original paperwork. Oh well... we just kind of winged it. Today she found it and wanted to call to tell me I had , in fact, lose 81/2 inches. Not all in one place mind you *giggle* but eight and one half inches off my person. Pretty cool, eh?
I want to talk about lots of interesting things but there's a voice in my head just humming a wee song that goes something klike' "golf, golf, golfie golf" so I can't really come up with anything. I think I need to be done.
I'll talk to y'all tomorrow with something clever and pithy but right now... I gotta go clean my golf shoes :)
ttyl
Sunday, June 26, 2011
day one hundred and seventy seven
The school of thought is, "never complain when you're busy" so please don't take this next bit as a complaint. We got the shit kicked out of us at work today. Crazy busy. So... many... people. *shudder* That said, it was great fun :)
On my way home from work I managed to connect with an old friend. This was necessary to get me off his "Shitler's List". Aside from getting off the list *phew* it was just pure joy talking with him. God I love old friends and resent that they can't all live on the same block as me.
More good news on the old friend front. Friend Janet (who qualifies as my oldest friend as we met in grade two) is in town and we get to spend an entire evening together. I'm over the moon.
This is an exhilarating vibe to take into the upcoming week (did I mention I'm in a golf tournament as well !!). So this week's goal? Enjoy! That's it... just enjoy the way my life unfolds and make sure I'm present for the whole thing :)
Keep on keepin' on :)
On my way home from work I managed to connect with an old friend. This was necessary to get me off his "Shitler's List". Aside from getting off the list *phew* it was just pure joy talking with him. God I love old friends and resent that they can't all live on the same block as me.
More good news on the old friend front. Friend Janet (who qualifies as my oldest friend as we met in grade two) is in town and we get to spend an entire evening together. I'm over the moon.
This is an exhilarating vibe to take into the upcoming week (did I mention I'm in a golf tournament as well !!). So this week's goal? Enjoy! That's it... just enjoy the way my life unfolds and make sure I'm present for the whole thing :)
Keep on keepin' on :)
Saturday, June 25, 2011
day one hundred and seventy six
Let's hear it for the simple things.
Some of you know that we have a lovely herb garden at work. It is somehow the most magical spot where the herbs just love to thrive. The basil in particular has gone a little mental. As I left work tonight I snipped quite a bit of it. Off to Fortino's for some bocconcini. Side note : if you keep track of sodium at all you may be interested to know that bocconcini has ZERO. Yep... zero sodium. Tonight's dinner was aforementioned bocconcini, fresh basil, a lovely field tomato and a sploosh of eevo. Simple and glorious :)
I have explained to Atticus this evening that the fewer moths one eats the less one will barf. (I know... that has nothing to do with the previous paragraph but I thought it wanted mentioning). Next random thought: even tho the weather has been, for the most part, ghastly the sky has been awful pretty. Last random thought for the night - I wish I had better handwriting.
Enough for now... ttyl :)
Some of you know that we have a lovely herb garden at work. It is somehow the most magical spot where the herbs just love to thrive. The basil in particular has gone a little mental. As I left work tonight I snipped quite a bit of it. Off to Fortino's for some bocconcini. Side note : if you keep track of sodium at all you may be interested to know that bocconcini has ZERO. Yep... zero sodium. Tonight's dinner was aforementioned bocconcini, fresh basil, a lovely field tomato and a sploosh of eevo. Simple and glorious :)
I have explained to Atticus this evening that the fewer moths one eats the less one will barf. (I know... that has nothing to do with the previous paragraph but I thought it wanted mentioning). Next random thought: even tho the weather has been, for the most part, ghastly the sky has been awful pretty. Last random thought for the night - I wish I had better handwriting.
Enough for now... ttyl :)
Friday, June 24, 2011
day one hundred and seventy five
And now for some most excellent words: " A Quick Nine".
These three little words can certainly turn one's day around. I was having a perfectly good day - alot accomplished and whatnot. Friend Big Jeff shows up at the appointed time and off we go for "a quick nine". Deeeelightful :) Once again I golfed really well (let's keep this in perspective people: I mean really well... for me) and Friend Big Jeff was on fire. Two birdies *delighted golf claps* I, myself managed two pars and a few bogies so I broke my own record at this particular course. Woot woot.
I can't decide if 25 lbs is the reason I'm golfing better. It only seems to make sense, no? I have certainly golfed better on my first three outings this year than I did on my first three outings last year. There is absolutely a difference in my body movements - I speak of the hips specifically where we girl golfers hold alot of power. I dunno but if other aspects of my life have gotten better, why not my golf game too :)
See you on the links, chums !!!
These three little words can certainly turn one's day around. I was having a perfectly good day - alot accomplished and whatnot. Friend Big Jeff shows up at the appointed time and off we go for "a quick nine". Deeeelightful :) Once again I golfed really well (let's keep this in perspective people: I mean really well... for me) and Friend Big Jeff was on fire. Two birdies *delighted golf claps* I, myself managed two pars and a few bogies so I broke my own record at this particular course. Woot woot.
I can't decide if 25 lbs is the reason I'm golfing better. It only seems to make sense, no? I have certainly golfed better on my first three outings this year than I did on my first three outings last year. There is absolutely a difference in my body movements - I speak of the hips specifically where we girl golfers hold alot of power. I dunno but if other aspects of my life have gotten better, why not my golf game too :)
See you on the links, chums !!!
Thursday, June 23, 2011
day one hundred and seventy four
The weather gods looked down today and smiled a little smile. The Big Bike for Heart and Stroke was a crazy amount of fun and only a few sprinkles here and there. It is a terrifically fun thing to do and I urge you to jump on your chance to ride it ! Or ride it twice as I did today :) I have to say we have some of the greatest regulars in the world. People who were just coming in for a quiet beer allowed themselves to be hijacked onto the bike so our team would be big enough. And then a few of them stayed to help out the next team. These are the moments that make yer heart big :)
Waterfit tonight with friend Margie. Ahhhh, the pain of it all. I believe that might be enough in the way of conventional exercise for this week. Hopefully a quick 9 after work tomorrow but that's not exercise... that just plain FUN :)
Keep on keepin' on everyone ...
Waterfit tonight with friend Margie. Ahhhh, the pain of it all. I believe that might be enough in the way of conventional exercise for this week. Hopefully a quick 9 after work tomorrow but that's not exercise... that just plain FUN :)
Keep on keepin' on everyone ...
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
day one hundred and seventy three
If the muscles at the back of the legs are hamstrings, what are the ones at the front called? I'll just call them thigh muscles and tell you that they are screeching. Gym after work tonight and while I didn't plan on doing any leg work... well it turns out that an exercise bike is, in fact, propelled by the legs. Crap.
I'm not sure we sing the praises of peanut butter often enough. I was so tired after last night's workout, I could only manage a smoothie (no chewing). Tonight, altho tired, I thought I could take in solid food... but what? Here comes a happy little peanut butter sammy to make my day complete. Yes, yes... today's lunch was a whack of veggies... I got it covered. Add in the ridiculous amount of water I drank today and I think we got a whole lotta "give 'er" goin' on :)
Tomorrow we ride The Big Bike for Heart and Stroke... *delighted clapping* It will be crazy fun !!
ttyl
I'm not sure we sing the praises of peanut butter often enough. I was so tired after last night's workout, I could only manage a smoothie (no chewing). Tonight, altho tired, I thought I could take in solid food... but what? Here comes a happy little peanut butter sammy to make my day complete. Yes, yes... today's lunch was a whack of veggies... I got it covered. Add in the ridiculous amount of water I drank today and I think we got a whole lotta "give 'er" goin' on :)
Tomorrow we ride The Big Bike for Heart and Stroke... *delighted clapping* It will be crazy fun !!
ttyl
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
day one hundred and seventy two
EJ tried to kill me tonight but he did not succeed. I live to fight another day (barely).
He keeps coming up with these horrific new exercises that tear me apart. Seriously... at one point tonight I was lying on the floor with my mouth open so wide I looked like a grounded fish, just gasping. Ha HA... I laugh in the face of this torture... I will prevail!!! (kinda sorta)
Needless to say I'm dropping in here tonight before I take a scalding hot bath. I's tired. Going to aim for the gym again tomorrow, but not quite so hard methinks. Seriously 58 days left, pedal to the metal and all that nonsense.
Keep on keepin' on my friends :)
He keeps coming up with these horrific new exercises that tear me apart. Seriously... at one point tonight I was lying on the floor with my mouth open so wide I looked like a grounded fish, just gasping. Ha HA... I laugh in the face of this torture... I will prevail!!! (kinda sorta)
Needless to say I'm dropping in here tonight before I take a scalding hot bath. I's tired. Going to aim for the gym again tomorrow, but not quite so hard methinks. Seriously 58 days left, pedal to the metal and all that nonsense.
Keep on keepin' on my friends :)
day one hundred and seventy one
Wouldja look at that? Half way there and it only took me 171 days :) I kid, but I'm pretty pleased.
I have, obviously, been thinking alot about the goal or rather the knowledge that I'm not going to make it in the allotted time. At this point I'm not sure another 25 is even something I want to do. Sure... another 10 maybe even 15 but 25??? I guess I worry that I'm shooting for a weight that I won't be able to maintain without some SERIOUS effort. Who knows... maybe Jan1 2012 I'll find myself 50 pounds down. The only thing I know FOR SURE is that I won't be back where I started. Once Aug 19th comes I like to take some time to let my body settle in to the weight it wants to be for awhile. 10 pounds in 2 months seems colossally impossible to me right now but I honestly think it's an achievable target.
We'll see. Right now I just keep on grinding and doing the best I can. I'm pretty proud of myself but here in the last stretch is no time for laurel sitting. It's time to....
GIV' ER :)
I have, obviously, been thinking alot about the goal or rather the knowledge that I'm not going to make it in the allotted time. At this point I'm not sure another 25 is even something I want to do. Sure... another 10 maybe even 15 but 25??? I guess I worry that I'm shooting for a weight that I won't be able to maintain without some SERIOUS effort. Who knows... maybe Jan1 2012 I'll find myself 50 pounds down. The only thing I know FOR SURE is that I won't be back where I started. Once Aug 19th comes I like to take some time to let my body settle in to the weight it wants to be for awhile. 10 pounds in 2 months seems colossally impossible to me right now but I honestly think it's an achievable target.
We'll see. Right now I just keep on grinding and doing the best I can. I'm pretty proud of myself but here in the last stretch is no time for laurel sitting. It's time to....
GIV' ER :)
Sunday, June 19, 2011
day one hundred and seventy
sixty... days... left *gulp*
Met the newest Nesbitt today: Miss Mila. As I've said before I'm not the biggest baby person but this little one is pretty special. It was great to see her being held by her Great Grandmother... "gg" as she's called. Very nice.
On this Sunday night I need to confess that I did not achieve my goal that I set for myself last Sunday night. Drat. So... that one stays in place and gets another goal added to it. Push-ups again (really, still) but I'm adding veggies to the mix. It was positively dis-spiriting to realize how low my veggie consumption had dropped. I know how terrifically important they are but I just can't seem to get them in. I have some terrific cookbooks so maybe that's the trick. I'll peruse them and see if anything catches my fancy... and shouldn't I be grilling them by now anyway :)
Met the newest Nesbitt today: Miss Mila. As I've said before I'm not the biggest baby person but this little one is pretty special. It was great to see her being held by her Great Grandmother... "gg" as she's called. Very nice.
On this Sunday night I need to confess that I did not achieve my goal that I set for myself last Sunday night. Drat. So... that one stays in place and gets another goal added to it. Push-ups again (really, still) but I'm adding veggies to the mix. It was positively dis-spiriting to realize how low my veggie consumption had dropped. I know how terrifically important they are but I just can't seem to get them in. I have some terrific cookbooks so maybe that's the trick. I'll peruse them and see if anything catches my fancy... and shouldn't I be grilling them by now anyway :)
Saturday, June 18, 2011
day one hundred and sixty nine
Tomorrow there will be two months left *shudder*
Beautiful day today and I got at a long put off chore. I have 3 "sculptures" in my back yard. What they are is the trunks of trees that have been carved. I love them a great deal but they weren't treated with anything and have been looking a bit sad. I went to Canadian Tire today and picked up some Thompsons water seal and painted them up. It was kinda fun and hopefully it'll make them last longer.
Pretty low key day, which was what I needed. Off tomorrow to meet the newest great-granbaby... Mila. A little secret here: I'm not one of those people who go over the moon about babies. Give me a good solid toddler and you have my attention, but infants? They're cute but I don't really get the vapours over them. Still, it'll be nice to see Jesse and Angela and the newest Nesbitt :)
ttyl
Beautiful day today and I got at a long put off chore. I have 3 "sculptures" in my back yard. What they are is the trunks of trees that have been carved. I love them a great deal but they weren't treated with anything and have been looking a bit sad. I went to Canadian Tire today and picked up some Thompsons water seal and painted them up. It was kinda fun and hopefully it'll make them last longer.
Pretty low key day, which was what I needed. Off tomorrow to meet the newest great-granbaby... Mila. A little secret here: I'm not one of those people who go over the moon about babies. Give me a good solid toddler and you have my attention, but infants? They're cute but I don't really get the vapours over them. Still, it'll be nice to see Jesse and Angela and the newest Nesbitt :)
ttyl
day one hundred and sixty eight
A late one tonight.... or early I guess. The birds will be singin' any minute.
Got my veggie groove back today, thank goodness. Mowed and edged the front and back lawns so that took care of my exercise. Definitely a gym day tomorrow tho.
I guess the only big news is the haircut. My, my, my it feels good to have short hair again. I think my face just wants to have a short kicky cut.
I'm obviously grasping at straws here cuz I'm awfully tired. Looking forward to a big sleep followed by a couple days of not much atall.
tty tomorrow (today) with hopefully a bit more excitement :)
Got my veggie groove back today, thank goodness. Mowed and edged the front and back lawns so that took care of my exercise. Definitely a gym day tomorrow tho.
I guess the only big news is the haircut. My, my, my it feels good to have short hair again. I think my face just wants to have a short kicky cut.
I'm obviously grasping at straws here cuz I'm awfully tired. Looking forward to a big sleep followed by a couple days of not much atall.
tty tomorrow (today) with hopefully a bit more excitement :)
Thursday, June 16, 2011
day one hundred and sixty seven
It's like I forgotten what vegetables are for. Seriously.... I can't seem to get the veggies in. Fruits, yes no prob, grains, meat, water, dairy... checkcheckcheckcheck, but no veggies. Someone needs to save me from myself.
Very much looking forward to my weekend off. Will there be golfing, lawn mowing, gardening? Who knows... it's all very tantalizing at this point. There certainly will be sleep - that's for darn sure :)
Getting my hair cut tomorrow. I had this idea that my "new look" could include growing out my hair. Dear Lord... I'd forgotten the patience required for such an undertaking. Living thru the seemingly interminable bad hair days. Reminding oneself of the end result. I'm giving in. It might be a suitable project for the winter but even just the couple of hot sticky days was enough to turn me off the experiment. Chopped it is :)
ttyl
Very much looking forward to my weekend off. Will there be golfing, lawn mowing, gardening? Who knows... it's all very tantalizing at this point. There certainly will be sleep - that's for darn sure :)
Getting my hair cut tomorrow. I had this idea that my "new look" could include growing out my hair. Dear Lord... I'd forgotten the patience required for such an undertaking. Living thru the seemingly interminable bad hair days. Reminding oneself of the end result. I'm giving in. It might be a suitable project for the winter but even just the couple of hot sticky days was enough to turn me off the experiment. Chopped it is :)
ttyl
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
day one hundred and sixty six
If you have the opportunity I highly recommend seeing the film version of Stephen Sondheim's Company. I do not recommend sitting in front of yappy dramoids. NPH was exactly right and Patti Lupone tore my heart out. God, she can belt. Sondheim's music is difficult to sing and everybody was spot on... yep LOVED it. Even better tho, was friend Liam. He really enjoyed it and at one point I think was singing a bit. That made my heart a great deal bigger :)
Did you see the moon tonight ? Crazy big. I have to tell you I love my 'hood on a warm summer's night. First there's a kid riding his bike backwards down Barton St. The bike was going in the right direction... he was facing backwards. Very elegant looking move as he actually seemed to be reclining. Then there's the sad hooker in a too tight white polyester chemise-y bit of business. Just trawlin'.
Nothing Project oriented tonight... except my dinner was a Mocha Frappacino and some popcorn. There's the wild side... think I'll walk on it :) Bringing healthy back tomorrow but over all a most excellent today !!
Did you see the moon tonight ? Crazy big. I have to tell you I love my 'hood on a warm summer's night. First there's a kid riding his bike backwards down Barton St. The bike was going in the right direction... he was facing backwards. Very elegant looking move as he actually seemed to be reclining. Then there's the sad hooker in a too tight white polyester chemise-y bit of business. Just trawlin'.
Nothing Project oriented tonight... except my dinner was a Mocha Frappacino and some popcorn. There's the wild side... think I'll walk on it :) Bringing healthy back tomorrow but over all a most excellent today !!
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
day one hundred and sixty five
Not much tonight. Really a blah-ish kind of day. Work was pleasant, the weather was pleasant, the staf and guests were pleasant. Dear God... I hope I'm not turning into someone who only thrives in chaos... nooooo.
Going to the movies tomorrow night with friend Casey and friend Liam. Silver City has the special events thingie and tomorrow night is the filmed version of Stephen Sondheim's Company starring lots of fabbo folks. I'll be interested in friend Liam's reaction but however he feels about it I think it's pretty cool that his first reaction wasn't (the 14 yr old version of) HELL NO. Cool dude.
I think more of my body than usual was engaged during my golf game yesterday. I figure that accounts for a: why I played better and b: why I am sore as hell today. *YIPES*. Those muscles at the top, back of yer legs... ouch.
Going to the movies tomorrow night with friend Casey and friend Liam. Silver City has the special events thingie and tomorrow night is the filmed version of Stephen Sondheim's Company starring lots of fabbo folks. I'll be interested in friend Liam's reaction but however he feels about it I think it's pretty cool that his first reaction wasn't (the 14 yr old version of) HELL NO. Cool dude.
I think more of my body than usual was engaged during my golf game yesterday. I figure that accounts for a: why I played better and b: why I am sore as hell today. *YIPES*. Those muscles at the top, back of yer legs... ouch.
Monday, June 13, 2011
day one hundred and sixty four
Most excellent golf day ever. Seriously people... I was on fire. We got rained on for three holes or so but other than that the day was pleasant enough temp-wise. I am honestly over the moon at how well I played. I guess 24 lbs does make a difference :) It might also help that I don't drink copious amounts of beer on the course anymore. I'm that guy who actually thinks I'm going to play better with a couple of beers in me . Uhhhh... no.
That said... not much else tonight. Pretty tired from all the fresh air and looking forward to hitting the sheets. And dreaming of playing golf again soon :)
G'night chums
That said... not much else tonight. Pretty tired from all the fresh air and looking forward to hitting the sheets. And dreaming of playing golf again soon :)
G'night chums
Sunday, June 12, 2011
day one hundred and sixty three
So... I bought a new bathing suit today. After last time's loss of the bottoms at Waterfit I knew it was due. It was fun to try on different models now cuz I have more choice. It turns out tho.... unless I'm missing something, bathing suit trying on is unpleasant no matter what size you are. I think I tried on 10 suits and by the end I was a hot mess. The other unfortunate thing about bathing suits is the inserted bra. Apparently swimsuit makers out there think that if you are a size 14 or above you have a ginormous rack. I do not possess this particular attribute. So there's me and then there's this enormous amount of bra material. *Yipes* I'm assuming the excess braness serves as a flotation device in case of emergency.
Great workout today. I giggle every time I write that. It's true tho. Weird thing is push ups. I have been slacking off on my push ups of late and did I ever notice it today. My first set of 21 I could only do 6. I did my other things and came back for my set of 15. Those I tossed off no prob. The point I'm making here is that on my first set it was actually like my body "forgot" how to do them. I think it goes to show that my legs and core are fully engaged in my day so they retain the muscle memory of how to do the exercises. My arms are apparently useless appendages that hang from my body and serve no purpose. So....
This week's goal : engage the upper body as much as possible. Really work on the push ups. I need to set a (reasonable ) goal for how many I'd like to be able to do in a row. I'm going to shoot for 25 but really aim for 30... wish me luck :)
Great workout today. I giggle every time I write that. It's true tho. Weird thing is push ups. I have been slacking off on my push ups of late and did I ever notice it today. My first set of 21 I could only do 6. I did my other things and came back for my set of 15. Those I tossed off no prob. The point I'm making here is that on my first set it was actually like my body "forgot" how to do them. I think it goes to show that my legs and core are fully engaged in my day so they retain the muscle memory of how to do the exercises. My arms are apparently useless appendages that hang from my body and serve no purpose. So....
This week's goal : engage the upper body as much as possible. Really work on the push ups. I need to set a (reasonable ) goal for how many I'd like to be able to do in a row. I'm going to shoot for 25 but really aim for 30... wish me luck :)
Saturday, June 11, 2011
day one hundred and sixty two
Went to the walk - in clinic this morning. Diagnosis : thrush... just as I had expected.
EXPLICIT CONTENT WARNING *** boy readers may just want to wait til tomorrow. Squeamish girl readers as well...
So... thrush. You wonder what thrush is. Well it's a fungal infection. As women it mostly manifests itself in the form of yeast infections. This particular variety is not treated with vagisil. No, this gets some nasty liquid called nystatin that one swishes and swallows. My mouth is vile. All I can say is... it's a good thing our va-jay-jay's don't have taste buds. My mouth tastes like a rancid pigeon crapped in it and then died. I imagine the only up side Project-wise is that I'm not really eating anything cuz it all tastes the same ... evil.
Alright, enough of that. training tomorrow with EJ so I'm off to swish and swallow and sleep.
ttyl (hey - did ya notice the ticker moved:) )
EXPLICIT CONTENT WARNING *** boy readers may just want to wait til tomorrow. Squeamish girl readers as well...
So... thrush. You wonder what thrush is. Well it's a fungal infection. As women it mostly manifests itself in the form of yeast infections. This particular variety is not treated with vagisil. No, this gets some nasty liquid called nystatin that one swishes and swallows. My mouth is vile. All I can say is... it's a good thing our va-jay-jay's don't have taste buds. My mouth tastes like a rancid pigeon crapped in it and then died. I imagine the only up side Project-wise is that I'm not really eating anything cuz it all tastes the same ... evil.
Alright, enough of that. training tomorrow with EJ so I'm off to swish and swallow and sleep.
ttyl (hey - did ya notice the ticker moved:) )
Friday, June 10, 2011
day one hundred and sixty one
Early post tonight cuz I feel like shit in a shingle. No two ways around it: it's been a tough week and I think it just caught up to me.
The good news is the temp dropped so I'm able to soak in a nice hot tub.
I think I have thrush or something cuz my tongue is covered with a vile coating which has left me with muck mouth since yesterday. I fear sleep is the only cure. I head there now.
Stay well, com padres and talk to you tomorrow...
The good news is the temp dropped so I'm able to soak in a nice hot tub.
I think I have thrush or something cuz my tongue is covered with a vile coating which has left me with muck mouth since yesterday. I fear sleep is the only cure. I head there now.
Stay well, com padres and talk to you tomorrow...
Thursday, June 9, 2011
day one hundred and sixty
70 days left.
I sometimes wonder if I'm going to miss this act of writing every night. I'm certainly going to miss the idea of it, but as for the actual sitting down to do it... ummmm... maybe not. There is a service offered by this site where you can get your blog(s) printed and bound. Like a real live book. This is something I'm thinking seriously of doing. Sort of keeping the historical record, as it were. Also I figure during the long slog that will be maintenance (aka the rest of my life) it will prob'ly be helpful to review the source material when I'm needing some guidance or a remembery of what this felt like. Strangely, I haven't reviewed any of them. I write 'em then move on to the next day. This writing has been valuable to me, no question and who knows... I may start another blog and pick up where this one leaves off :)
ttyl
I sometimes wonder if I'm going to miss this act of writing every night. I'm certainly going to miss the idea of it, but as for the actual sitting down to do it... ummmm... maybe not. There is a service offered by this site where you can get your blog(s) printed and bound. Like a real live book. This is something I'm thinking seriously of doing. Sort of keeping the historical record, as it were. Also I figure during the long slog that will be maintenance (aka the rest of my life) it will prob'ly be helpful to review the source material when I'm needing some guidance or a remembery of what this felt like. Strangely, I haven't reviewed any of them. I write 'em then move on to the next day. This writing has been valuable to me, no question and who knows... I may start another blog and pick up where this one leaves off :)
ttyl
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
day one hundred and fiftynine
Well.... I think any day that's starts with a power outage can't be all bad. Crazy start but we got electricity about 10:30 so all was well. Until the humidity descended. Jesus Christ on a cracker it was hot in that restaurant today. Air conditioning? Meh. If I can sit in a puddle of my own sweat at home (as I'm doing now) than I can certainly do it at work. Yep... tomorrow I get that looked at.
No gym today. Turns out 11 hours running around in a sweatbox feels just like exercise. Good day eating but resorted to the trusty peanut butter at dinner. The theory was to make a nice potato salad to have during the week but the thought of boiling potatoes gave me the vapours so PB it was.
Off now for a ridiculously cold shower then sprint to bed where the industrial floor fan is blowing before my body realizes how stupid hot it is.
Stay cool chums :)
No gym today. Turns out 11 hours running around in a sweatbox feels just like exercise. Good day eating but resorted to the trusty peanut butter at dinner. The theory was to make a nice potato salad to have during the week but the thought of boiling potatoes gave me the vapours so PB it was.
Off now for a ridiculously cold shower then sprint to bed where the industrial floor fan is blowing before my body realizes how stupid hot it is.
Stay cool chums :)
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
day one hundred and fifty eight
Today was definitely interesting. Lots of stuff accomplished but unfortunately on Bernie's "hurry up and wait" schedule. It works for him but tends to leave the rest of us scrambling. The stink of me right now is appalling. I power sprayed 10 green bins and manged not to miss myself even once. I actually threw away the shoes I was wearing.
Here's the odd thing I've found out about myself lately. First off, my body now hates crappy food. I mean it actually rebels when I shove in something blechy. I'm speaking here of yesterday's pizza from the Westtown. Last night as I was blogging I felt completely gross and this morning... well, suffice to say, bathroom time was not pretty. Was my body so inured to crap that it just put up with it? I'm sorry body for all the lousy things I did to you.
The second thing I've noticed is that in the old days (before Jan 1 2011) when I was crazy busy I didn't just eat lousy, I ate high calorie, high sugar, high sodium lousy. Now, when faced with the crazy sched I've had lately I'm eating way too little. In trying to eat better we sometimes gravitate to low fat, fat free stuff. If I'm having trouble getting 1200 calories in per day why am I bothering with low anything? Sour cream? yep... full fat. I'm stewing some rhubarb tonight and thought briefly of using Splenda. Honestly... the whole batch takes less than a quarter cup of sugar... so I'm using the friggin' sugar.
Feels good to understand more about what my body wants. I remember when I first started to blog I talked about the little voice that urged me to pick the right things. I think that voice has established itself and I disregard it at my peril :)
ttyl
Here's the odd thing I've found out about myself lately. First off, my body now hates crappy food. I mean it actually rebels when I shove in something blechy. I'm speaking here of yesterday's pizza from the Westtown. Last night as I was blogging I felt completely gross and this morning... well, suffice to say, bathroom time was not pretty. Was my body so inured to crap that it just put up with it? I'm sorry body for all the lousy things I did to you.
The second thing I've noticed is that in the old days (before Jan 1 2011) when I was crazy busy I didn't just eat lousy, I ate high calorie, high sugar, high sodium lousy. Now, when faced with the crazy sched I've had lately I'm eating way too little. In trying to eat better we sometimes gravitate to low fat, fat free stuff. If I'm having trouble getting 1200 calories in per day why am I bothering with low anything? Sour cream? yep... full fat. I'm stewing some rhubarb tonight and thought briefly of using Splenda. Honestly... the whole batch takes less than a quarter cup of sugar... so I'm using the friggin' sugar.
Feels good to understand more about what my body wants. I remember when I first started to blog I talked about the little voice that urged me to pick the right things. I think that voice has established itself and I disregard it at my peril :)
ttyl
Monday, June 6, 2011
day one hundred and fifty seven
Went to see Bridesmaids with friend Casey tonight. It has been a long time since I've seen a movie that made me laugh that hard. I'm going straight to the two thumbs up :)
Another tragic eating day that has only served to reinforce how much I enjoy eating well. I honestly feel like a bucket of shite right now. *Geez* Lesson learned.
Lots to do at the restaurant tomorrow as we're shutting half a day for repairs. I'm looking forward to it, but mostly I'm looking forward to hitting the gym after that. Yep... you read that right - I'm actually looking forward to some gym time. Check for pods !!
Keep on keepin' on y'all :)
Another tragic eating day that has only served to reinforce how much I enjoy eating well. I honestly feel like a bucket of shite right now. *Geez* Lesson learned.
Lots to do at the restaurant tomorrow as we're shutting half a day for repairs. I'm looking forward to it, but mostly I'm looking forward to hitting the gym after that. Yep... you read that right - I'm actually looking forward to some gym time. Check for pods !!
Keep on keepin' on y'all :)
day one hundred and fifty six
Well that's the back end of another Buskerfest. Thank God. Tremendous Fri. and Sun. with a bit of a dip on Sat. As always I'm terrifically proud of my team :)
Today's eating was tragic. Got off to a good start with some oatmeal but there was no time til I got home at 7 then I was just too tired. Back to work for 10 and the after party so I'm just zonked.
Looking forward to the movies with friend Casey tomorrow. Is it wrong that I'm already getting excited about popcorn ?
On this Sunday night I'm looking forward to sensible eating, quality exercise and a whole heap of sleep in the upcoming week. Also I'd like to lose a pound or two ;)
G'night y'all !!
Today's eating was tragic. Got off to a good start with some oatmeal but there was no time til I got home at 7 then I was just too tired. Back to work for 10 and the after party so I'm just zonked.
Looking forward to the movies with friend Casey tomorrow. Is it wrong that I'm already getting excited about popcorn ?
On this Sunday night I'm looking forward to sensible eating, quality exercise and a whole heap of sleep in the upcoming week. Also I'd like to lose a pound or two ;)
G'night y'all !!
Saturday, June 4, 2011
day one hundred and fifty five
75 days left *yipes*
Thought we were in for a twister today and it did indeed rain like heck. Luckily it was strong but short-livedso Busker wasn't washed out. Would have preferred the temp be a bit higher but... at least it wasn't raining. Busy enough day... thanks for asking :)
I think I'm going to try another calorie cycle next week... mostly just because I can. Back to the gym and see if I can go from 2 abs to 4.
Obviously the tank is pretty empty tonight, so I'm going to slip into the hot bath I'm drawing, read the chick lit friend Heather lent me and off to bed. One more day of Buskerfest... wheeeee
Thought we were in for a twister today and it did indeed rain like heck. Luckily it was strong but short-livedso Busker wasn't washed out. Would have preferred the temp be a bit higher but... at least it wasn't raining. Busy enough day... thanks for asking :)
I think I'm going to try another calorie cycle next week... mostly just because I can. Back to the gym and see if I can go from 2 abs to 4.
Obviously the tank is pretty empty tonight, so I'm going to slip into the hot bath I'm drawing, read the chick lit friend Heather lent me and off to bed. One more day of Buskerfest... wheeeee
Friday, June 3, 2011
day one hundred and fifty four
I love that one of our nation's great symbols graces my front yard (not a beaver, not a Tim Horton's franchise) but enough with the Maple keys already. Seriously, fall off the frickin' trees already and be done.
No exercise today unless you count going up and down the stairs at the Cactus 4000 times. I swear... 4000 at least! All was prepared for the Buskerfest, now it just needs to hum along at its own special rhythm and be done.
So thrilled to have tuna salad for lunch today. Sometimes I think people would find it cool to work in a restaurant and eat restaurant food everyday. Let me tell ya... it wears thin.The thing that is cool is that all I need to bring is the can of tuna. Need some celery? Chopped and waiting. Green onions... same. A little dry mustard powder to zip that up... yup.
Bedtime cuz it's all busker all day tomorrow...
ttyl
No exercise today unless you count going up and down the stairs at the Cactus 4000 times. I swear... 4000 at least! All was prepared for the Buskerfest, now it just needs to hum along at its own special rhythm and be done.
So thrilled to have tuna salad for lunch today. Sometimes I think people would find it cool to work in a restaurant and eat restaurant food everyday. Let me tell ya... it wears thin.The thing that is cool is that all I need to bring is the can of tuna. Need some celery? Chopped and waiting. Green onions... same. A little dry mustard powder to zip that up... yup.
Bedtime cuz it's all busker all day tomorrow...
ttyl
Thursday, June 2, 2011
day one hundred and fifty three
What a full day I had :)
Terrific lunch at Bangkok Spoon with friend Heather. So yummy. Friend Heather is a true inspiration to me. She is working so hard on her weight loss journey and is just kickin' it. Makes me want to be better... but not so much better that I join her at the gym at the ungodly hour of the morning she goes :)
I stopped at the Canadian Tire to buy a replacement reel for my WeedEater but a very handsome firefighter convinced me I could refill the old one myself at half the cost with three times as much line. I didn't believe him but his handsomeness persuaded me , so I bought it.
Off home to mow the back yard... mow, thresh... whatever. After the mowing I attempted to replace the line in my WeedEater. Whattya know, handsome firefighter was right. I'm so DIY :)
Next stop friend Margie's so we could go to Waterfit. Ah Waterfit... I'd forgotten how much i loved you. What I did not love was losing my bathing suit bottoms cuz they are just too large. *Yipes*. O.K. so I gotta buy a new suit. There are worse things.
I'm off now to sleep the sleep of the just before the big weekend begins. I'm there all weekend folks... so if you're hitting Buskerfest be sure to drop by and say hi.
ttyl
Terrific lunch at Bangkok Spoon with friend Heather. So yummy. Friend Heather is a true inspiration to me. She is working so hard on her weight loss journey and is just kickin' it. Makes me want to be better... but not so much better that I join her at the gym at the ungodly hour of the morning she goes :)
I stopped at the Canadian Tire to buy a replacement reel for my WeedEater but a very handsome firefighter convinced me I could refill the old one myself at half the cost with three times as much line. I didn't believe him but his handsomeness persuaded me , so I bought it.
Off home to mow the back yard... mow, thresh... whatever. After the mowing I attempted to replace the line in my WeedEater. Whattya know, handsome firefighter was right. I'm so DIY :)
Next stop friend Margie's so we could go to Waterfit. Ah Waterfit... I'd forgotten how much i loved you. What I did not love was losing my bathing suit bottoms cuz they are just too large. *Yipes*. O.K. so I gotta buy a new suit. There are worse things.
I'm off now to sleep the sleep of the just before the big weekend begins. I'm there all weekend folks... so if you're hitting Buskerfest be sure to drop by and say hi.
ttyl
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
day one hundred and fifty two
Well... I'm as ready for Buskerfest as I'm likely to be. Glad to have tomorrow off to recharge before the big weekend. Going to stock my office with cans of tuna, and healthy things so I make sure to get some good eating in.
I know it's day 152 but I'm tired of thinking and talking about weight loss. I think what I'm really tired of this this gd plateau. I know it's just a "body getting used to it" phase but it's pissing me off. I just want my body to do what I want it to. Stupid, I know, but true none-the-less. I've worked hard and I think I'm going thru a pissy, self pity phase. I'll come round but tonight I'm just grumpy.
Off for a cool bath and an attempt to shave my legs in spite of the sunburn... seriously -they're nasty :)
Keep on keepin' on y'all. I know I'll be back in fighting trim tomorrow :)
I know it's day 152 but I'm tired of thinking and talking about weight loss. I think what I'm really tired of this this gd plateau. I know it's just a "body getting used to it" phase but it's pissing me off. I just want my body to do what I want it to. Stupid, I know, but true none-the-less. I've worked hard and I think I'm going thru a pissy, self pity phase. I'll come round but tonight I'm just grumpy.
Off for a cool bath and an attempt to shave my legs in spite of the sunburn... seriously -they're nasty :)
Keep on keepin' on y'all. I know I'll be back in fighting trim tomorrow :)
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
day one hundred and fifty one
I come to you tonight from tired town. I had forgotten how exhausting a bad sunburn can be. Add in today's crazy heat and forget it... I'm done.
No gym today cuz of afore-mentioned sunburn but I'm gonna aim for tomorrow. Perhaps people think I'm exaggerating when I talk about hating the gym. Nope... I hate it. I see the good in it, and I see the difference it's making in my body and I'm pleased but unfortunately it doesn't push me nearer to loving it. At this point I think of it as a necessary evil... like cat litter. One thing I should mention tho' is everybody who I've come into contact with is super nice. They're nice folks who seem to care alot about what they're doing.
I've fallen into cooking limbo so I think I better take some cookbooks to bed as my late night reading to try and get the juices flowing again. Gotta buy some cous cous :)
Stay cool my friends and keep on keepin' on. As a side note ... is anybody else pissed that we went from late winter straight into the dog days of summer. Did spring take a hike this year?
No gym today cuz of afore-mentioned sunburn but I'm gonna aim for tomorrow. Perhaps people think I'm exaggerating when I talk about hating the gym. Nope... I hate it. I see the good in it, and I see the difference it's making in my body and I'm pleased but unfortunately it doesn't push me nearer to loving it. At this point I think of it as a necessary evil... like cat litter. One thing I should mention tho' is everybody who I've come into contact with is super nice. They're nice folks who seem to care alot about what they're doing.
I've fallen into cooking limbo so I think I better take some cookbooks to bed as my late night reading to try and get the juices flowing again. Gotta buy some cous cous :)
Stay cool my friends and keep on keepin' on. As a side note ... is anybody else pissed that we went from late winter straight into the dog days of summer. Did spring take a hike this year?
Monday, May 30, 2011
day one hundred and fifty
I celebrated day 150 with the first round of golf for the season. I am certainly paying the price now but it was totally worth it. Pain, I'm saying... I'm in alot of pain.
We got to the course (Rockway Glen) and were informed no golf carts could go out. It was just too wet. If we hadn't driven so far I might have taken this as a sign we should try another day. Well... at least my new Footjoys were clean from the pro shop to the first tee. Hip waders would have been more appropriate than golf shoes. Never have I played such a sodden course. We mucked along as best we could and actually had a great deal of fun. About the fourth hole the sun came out. It came out large and it came out hot. The ground was steaming and the air temp was about 35. HOT. My FJ's are filthy and I have mud from my ankles to my knees. I looked like I'd been for a spa treatment and forgotten to rinse off. About the 10th hole the bugs realized we were out there. So many bugs. Big, little, bitey, up yer nose-y, in your ears-y bugs. By the 18th hole (damn... didn't cross the water... sooo close) the tanks were empty. We were so tired from the back nine Bataan Death March that it was all we could do to slide in the car and drive home.
But, you see... we're golfers. On the ride home we discussed every lousy shot and re-lived every great shot. (I got two bogies!!) Would I do it again tomorrow... no. Was it super fun... you bet!
My FJ's are clean and I just took a shower that almost killed me. Did I mention the hard part about scrubbing the mud was the ridiculous sunburn I'm sporting?
My MFP tells me that 41/2 hours of golf (pulling clubs) burns about 1400 calories. There... I snuck in something that has to do with the Project :)
I'm off to moisturize and sleep... ttyl :)
We got to the course (Rockway Glen) and were informed no golf carts could go out. It was just too wet. If we hadn't driven so far I might have taken this as a sign we should try another day. Well... at least my new Footjoys were clean from the pro shop to the first tee. Hip waders would have been more appropriate than golf shoes. Never have I played such a sodden course. We mucked along as best we could and actually had a great deal of fun. About the fourth hole the sun came out. It came out large and it came out hot. The ground was steaming and the air temp was about 35. HOT. My FJ's are filthy and I have mud from my ankles to my knees. I looked like I'd been for a spa treatment and forgotten to rinse off. About the 10th hole the bugs realized we were out there. So many bugs. Big, little, bitey, up yer nose-y, in your ears-y bugs. By the 18th hole (damn... didn't cross the water... sooo close) the tanks were empty. We were so tired from the back nine Bataan Death March that it was all we could do to slide in the car and drive home.
But, you see... we're golfers. On the ride home we discussed every lousy shot and re-lived every great shot. (I got two bogies!!) Would I do it again tomorrow... no. Was it super fun... you bet!
My FJ's are clean and I just took a shower that almost killed me. Did I mention the hard part about scrubbing the mud was the ridiculous sunburn I'm sporting?
My MFP tells me that 41/2 hours of golf (pulling clubs) burns about 1400 calories. There... I snuck in something that has to do with the Project :)
I'm off to moisturize and sleep... ttyl :)
Sunday, May 29, 2011
day one hundred and forty nine
Glad I got those eavestroughs done yesterday... it is some rainin' :) But I know it will stop because I have an 11:30 tee time and as God is my witness... I...SHALL...GOLF !!!
I gotta - bought new Footjoys today !
I was lucky enough to reconnect with an old friend today. There is honestly nothing like being with someone you've known since you were a kid. It was a good today :)
So, here I am on another Sunday night looking out over another week. What do I want to bring to the table? Even tho' I have a measly 81 days left, I think I need to have a breather. The plateau has weighed heavier on me than I like to admit. I truly believe that only time will overcome it. I'm eating great, watering like a maniac and getting in some serious exercise. I need to realize this week that I've given my body all the tools and it's going to take it's own sweet time giving me results. Kinda fair, in a way, since I treated it like hell for so long. So this week is "stay the course" and "steady as she goes". Hmmmm... ship cliches... that's new... *shrug*
See ya tamarra :)
I gotta - bought new Footjoys today !
I was lucky enough to reconnect with an old friend today. There is honestly nothing like being with someone you've known since you were a kid. It was a good today :)
So, here I am on another Sunday night looking out over another week. What do I want to bring to the table? Even tho' I have a measly 81 days left, I think I need to have a breather. The plateau has weighed heavier on me than I like to admit. I truly believe that only time will overcome it. I'm eating great, watering like a maniac and getting in some serious exercise. I need to realize this week that I've given my body all the tools and it's going to take it's own sweet time giving me results. Kinda fair, in a way, since I treated it like hell for so long. So this week is "stay the course" and "steady as she goes". Hmmmm... ship cliches... that's new... *shrug*
See ya tamarra :)
day one hundred and forty-eight
Task one of the weekend off complete :)
I went to my neighbour's house today to borrow a ladder. When they asked me why I explained my plan to clean out my eavestroughs. "NO, no, no", they yelled "you can't". Turns out they thought it unseemly for a "lady" (their words, not mine) to climb a ladder and clean out her own gutters. I objected strenuously that I was, in fact, perfectly up to the task. Didn't matter... these fellas were not going to let me do it. I thought about it for a minute and graciously relented. An hour and a half and three beers later... perfectly clean eavestroughs. I'm pretty lucky I live in such a gallant neighbourhood. And it was pretty grotty.
Spent the rest of the day cleaning up the mucky mess and generally yardworking. Quiet day... exactly like I wanted.
Tomorrow is staff meeting and then the search continues for new golf shoes.
Didn't think alot about food or exercise today which makes a nice change. Maybe that's what I need to bust this blasted plateau... just a big chillax about the whole Project. We'll see...
I went to my neighbour's house today to borrow a ladder. When they asked me why I explained my plan to clean out my eavestroughs. "NO, no, no", they yelled "you can't". Turns out they thought it unseemly for a "lady" (their words, not mine) to climb a ladder and clean out her own gutters. I objected strenuously that I was, in fact, perfectly up to the task. Didn't matter... these fellas were not going to let me do it. I thought about it for a minute and graciously relented. An hour and a half and three beers later... perfectly clean eavestroughs. I'm pretty lucky I live in such a gallant neighbourhood. And it was pretty grotty.
Spent the rest of the day cleaning up the mucky mess and generally yardworking. Quiet day... exactly like I wanted.
Tomorrow is staff meeting and then the search continues for new golf shoes.
Didn't think alot about food or exercise today which makes a nice change. Maybe that's what I need to bust this blasted plateau... just a big chillax about the whole Project. We'll see...
Saturday, May 28, 2011
day one hundred and forty seven
Long, busy evening. Working out before work gave me a ton of energy but I hit the wall about midnight and am ready to hit the sheets.
Pretty good news from the gym assessment. Losing body fat, which I guess is the point and the measurements shrinking. Woot woot!
Got nothin' else to chat about tonight ... gotta... go... to... sleep
ttyl
Pretty good news from the gym assessment. Losing body fat, which I guess is the point and the measurements shrinking. Woot woot!
Got nothin' else to chat about tonight ... gotta... go... to... sleep
ttyl
Thursday, May 26, 2011
day one hundred and forty six
I am an obstinately right handed person. Sure, I catch a baseball with my left hand but other than that it's just the side I wear my watch on. Somedays I assume it's there only to keep me balanced. So today, when I sliced off the top bit of my left thumb I thought: "no worries... I never use that hand anyway". D'oh. Muy hurto :(
Not alot going on today. I have my 5 week assessment at the gym tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing what progress I've made. I console myself with the thought that I won't be the heaving mess I was 5 weeks ago... *fingers crossed*.
Closing tomorrow night and gonna aim for a little P-A-R-T-Y atmosphere !! Woot woot. Weekend off, so yard work - those eavestroughs aren't going to clean themselves, staff meeting and if all goes well... I don't want to jinx it but here goes... first round of golf with my brother on Monday. Please Mother Nature... I've been good :)
Not alot going on today. I have my 5 week assessment at the gym tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing what progress I've made. I console myself with the thought that I won't be the heaving mess I was 5 weeks ago... *fingers crossed*.
Closing tomorrow night and gonna aim for a little P-A-R-T-Y atmosphere !! Woot woot. Weekend off, so yard work - those eavestroughs aren't going to clean themselves, staff meeting and if all goes well... I don't want to jinx it but here goes... first round of golf with my brother on Monday. Please Mother Nature... I've been good :)
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