day ninety

Welcome to math day. Now I think we all understand this might be a bit painful but just remember numbers are our friend.

Ninety days... in a row... holy crap !! So I figure that's more or less 3 months (see - the math has started). If we check the ticker it says 17 lbs lost. OK... that's 5.6 lbs per month. Or 1.4 lbs per week. Hold on, I'm getting a bit confused *breaths into paper bag*... alright, I think this means I'm exactly on track to finish the Project but I'm not completely sure. I have 140 days left which is 20 weeks. 20 x 1.4 = 28 (plus 17 equals 45) Oops... and just like that *finger snap* math is not my friend anymore :(

Ahhh, nothing to worry about. First of all I've never completely trusted math. We had a falling out in the 9th grade and our relationship never fully recovered. More to the point, if this was ever really about the "final number" that's pretty much gone away. Will I be disappointed if I don't lose 50 lbs by my 50th? Sure, a bit, but the numbers fall by the wayside when compared to the lessons (blessings) I've gotten and continue to get every day.

day eightynine

Stellar day... thank you Momma Nature, I needed that :)

Started out the day with a terrific lunch at the Bangkok Spoon. I love going to a place where the eating choices are pretty easy. That said... did I have their delectable veggie spring rolls? Oh yesssss I certainly did. I am so in love with the mango salad that I don't have a large enough vocabulary to express it. With apologies to Woody Allen: I lurve it. (Trust me youngsters - that reference is killer). The best part of lunch you ask? A leisurely gabfest with friend Heather... so fun. Afterwards we got coffee to go from Detour Roasters and if you haven't seen them make coffee yet it's worth the trip.

Now we are at the shopping portion of the program. I don't have ANY money but my jeans are starting to look like (in the words of friend Sandy) poopy diapers. I got to Limeridge *shudder* and thought NO... I will not step foot in a plus sized store. I have found there is a new trope to go along with the death and taxes thing regarding a dead cert... jeans are sooooo annoying to try on. I went for the size I thought would fit me and they were too big. I went a size smaller and they just weren't... right. And need I mention that the ones that fit best were these fabbo levis that came in at just under $100. Nooooo, Cathy don't pay no hunnert dollars for no pair of jeans.

Anyhoo... great day and I hope y'all grabbed some of it :)

day eightyeighty

Now that's how I like a close shift to go. Crazy busy dinner (excuse me folks you all know it's TUESDAY right?), followed by getting great swaths of paperwork done (sayonara HST and WSIB) and all the guests out by 130. SWEET:)

I'm feeling pretty pumped about life right now. I know everything is cyclical but I'm hoping I can hang onto this feeling for quite awhile. April has turned out to be a fairly sad and introspective month for me. I 've thought of my dad often during this journey and I know he'd be proud of what I'm accomplishing. I'm hoping that this new direction of my life will let me skirt through the next month relatively unscathed. I don't mind so much the missing of him but I don't want it to wipe me out like it has in the past. But I'm not gonna lie: gosh I miss him.

Onwards and upwards my friends (or downwards for me really :) )

day eightyseven

Stunner of a day. Got my exercise outside today by walking Vito to the dog park. You really haven't lived until you've seen an uncoordinated chocolate lab try to roll around in the snow which is unfortunately on the side of a hill that he uncontrollably careens down sideways. He is an entertaining fellow :)

Not much on my mind tonight. I have an odd week ahead of me that involves opens and closes but hopefully won't present too many challenges food and exercise-wise.

Got some terrific news tonight that one of the gals on the journey has broken the all important 25 lb mark. Kudos to you Jenn plus a big woot woot !  That little piece of news is not only tremendous for you but also serves to bolster my efforts. I'm comin' up right behind ya sista :)

day eightysix

Today I'm thinkin' about "personal bests". This train of thought was supplied by friend Casey who ran the Around the Bay 5K and beat her previous personal best time. Serious woot, woot for you kiddo :)

This whole Project feels like one big beat my personal best everyday. I have an end goal quite obviously but it's those little PB's along the way that are going to get me there. Am I hitting my workout a little harder than I did yesterday? Can I come up with a new recipe to get the healthy in me? The shirt that didn't fit two months ago... all little PB's that spur me on.

I know that a journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step but there needs to be a heck of alot of single steps after that first one. The PB's are benchmarks along the way that make the 3,427th step possible.

Have a great week y'all

day eightyfive

Easter needs to come and go quickly this year. If I have to walk into a store and see one more damn Cadbury's Cream Egg I might snap. How I love the small gooey eggness of the Cadbury Cream Egg. The only thing that consoles me currently is the fact that they're so SMALL anymore. *sigh* perhaps that will be my next treat day :)

More super fun finds at the grocery store tonight. I'm apparently all about the smoothies right now and my big, unsightly Oster just wasn't cutting it. I was seriously considering the merits of the Magic Bullet when I went into Fortino's tonight and their wee 2 speed blenders were on sale for twenty bucks. Now there's almost nothin' I won't buy for twenty bucks! Next I'm going back for the (you guessed it) twenty buck food processor *hee hee hee*

My beautiful little (I think) tulips poked their heads out from under the snow today... hope they're well. A big shout out to friend Casey who I think is going to shave some serious time off her PB tomorrow at the Around the Bay Road Race. I'm vibin' ya sister !!!

day eightyfour

Checking in early tonight cuz I'm not sure how long I'm going to last. I is tired!! A good tired tho I think. Got up and at it super early this morning, more brain activity at work than usual (damn you Quickbooks) then running around with la pooch. I'm slightly embarrassed that at quarter of eight on a Friday night I'm ready for a hot bath and bed with one of my new books. Ahhhh, the ceaseless whirl that is my life :)

Truthfully, I got nothing... I was just kinda ponderin' how lucky I am. I think this hurtling toward 50 business has me taking all kinds of stock. Not just my weight and health but the overall quality of my life. It's pretty good and I'm grateful that I see that. The picyune details that wash over me daily can sometimes obscure the big picture but I gotta tell you... my big picture is pretty sweet :)

Keep on keepin' on ...

day eightythree

Let's talk about pizza ! Yep PIZZA :) This would be one of those things that I thought I'd be better off saying bye to. OH SO WRONG. Tonight I made a pizza *giggle* with flatbread, 0 sugar pasta sauce (roasted garlic), turkey pepperoni, and light shredded cheese. I'm really chuffed with myself.

I think for alot of people this cooking thing just comes naturally, like the ability to play an instument or speak a foreign language... an aptitude. I figure anybody could absolutely learn to speak French or play the piano but those with an aptitude transcend the learning and make it their own. I have never had an aptitude for cooking. I can make things but there is no joie de vivre on the plate. This journey is bringing me closer to that place. Quite obviously I love to eat but you know how they say: "you never want to know how the sausage is made"? Forget the sausage... I've been happy enough all along to have great food just show up in front of me without being the least bit curious how it got there. I have been served some great food in my life and I've watched great cooks get an enormous amount of pleasure from the exercise.

 Maybe I'm learning what food really is. Maybe I'm seeing it clearly for the first time. For a long time food has been an enemy, a best friend, a consolation, even a punishment. I'm getting to the point where I can divorce those feelings from the act of eating and rediscover the simple pleasure of it .

Yep... that was some pizza :)

day eightytwo

Well, is there really anything else to talk about? How 'bout that snow... I guess I didn't take the forecast v. seriously cuz when I went to bed at about midnight last night it was dry as a bone. Imagine my surprise when I woke up. More to the point imagine my joy that I didn't have to go to work :)

Today I got to eat well, workout, play with Vito in the snow, curl up with my new books, catch up with a dear friend. Holy cats... I'm tired.

I am over the moon to be at the 15 lb. mark. 20 seems so close now.

Stay warm peeps, and get to where you're going safely. Was it really yesterday that I was going to go to the driving range. Gosh I like spring in Ontario... always keeps ya guessin' !

day eightyone

Had kind of a weird eating day but in the end I'm pretty proud of myself.

 Good breakfast (love my oats) and a sensible lunch (the laughing cow makes my day better) then I went shopping. Vito is now the proud owner a beautiful new spring collar... so handsome! I bought Atticus a couple of the cat nip toys she loves so much. I feel like a pusher on a school yard whenever I see sweet Atticus go into paroxysms of catnip joy.  Went to Chapters and spent waaaay too much money. My reasoning? I haven't bought books for awhile, one of them was a healthy cookbook (Hungry Girl... the name of the book, not me), I deserved a treat ... oh yeah I can come up with some crazy ass rationalizations when I need to.

So I didn't get home from the Meadowlands til 5 and then felt the urgent need for a nap. Here comes my food dilemna: I woke up at 730 and pondered dinner. Whilst pondering I realized I needed to workout. So workout takes 45 minutes and I don't really want to do it on a full tummy. Now it's like 8 and I can forget the workout and cook supper or vice versa. I REALLY want to get to the 15 lb mark so workout it is (and besides I'm not particularly hungry at this point and I'm trying to stay away from eating for the sake of it).

I workout and then the lightbulb goes off. Greek yogurt, frozen raspberries, almond milk and a touch of vanilla will ABSOLUTELY  do the trick. The upshot? Smoothies... they're not just for breakfast anymore !!

day eighty

For those of you keeping track it's 80 down 150 to go. *EEK*

Not too much on my mind today. I opened my fridge when I got home and was struck by a) how full it is and b) how healthy the stuff in there is. For years I lived with a fridge full of alcohol and condiments. It's strange to me now that I can actually come home, open the fridge, go to my well stocked spice cupboard and make a dinner. This is seriously grown uppy stuff.

I don't need to lose 50 lbs anymore... now I need to lose 36. That takes some of the pressure off :)

Looking forward to my two days off and kind of loafing. (and maybe some yardwork) but mostly loafing...

day seventynine

I thought the hardest part of this journey would be the eating right and exercising. I was wrong. The hardest part of this journey is writing in this blog every night. I started it cuz I wanted accountability but I find that I am self censoring. Plainly: I don't want to bore folks with the inner workings of my not always straight forward mind. I had a good chat today with someone who urged me to use my blog the way I need to. I guess I'm a little bit afraid of giving too much of myself away. I've always had alot of people around me but I'm miserly with what I'm actually willing to share. Funny, for how much talking I do you'd think there wouldn't be much left people didn't know about me :)

There's a terrible trite saying : dance as if no one's watching. I think I have to start writing as if no one's reading. It's scary and I won't start tonight *collective sigh of relief* but I guess I needed to say it out loud to start to make it come true. Here I am on another Sunday night setting up a goal for the upcoming week. Let's hope I can get to this one.

Side note : I figured out what my next tattoo will be ! Fat people lose track of their bones... mostly wrist and collar bones. When I complete the project I plan on honouring the process by having the outline of a star tattooed around my wrist bone (which has recently reappeared). It'll remind me of all the hard work it took to get there :)

day seventyeight

Nope... nothing witty and trenchant tonight. The feeling of mellow continues with an overlay of tired. Maybe the time change kicked the stuffing out of me this week, who knows. I did take the night off working out cuz I just didn't have it in me.
I'm looking forward to seeing the "supermoon". In fact I may slip out right now and report back...

O.K.... took me a minute to find it. True to expectations it seems very big. But is it "super" ? Not sure... I'll have to wait til it climbs a little higher before I render my verdict.

So looking forward to the weather changing and staying changed. Everybody at my house seems to have a little spring fever. OK... enough babbling. Thanks for checking in and all things being equal, hopefully we'll talk again tomorrow :)

day seventyseven

Posting early tonight cuz I find myself a wee bit tired. Just finished my workout and it seems to have thrown me for a bit of a loop tonight :)

Not much to report: pretty quiet day on the Project front. I'm deliriously happy (as I know we all are) that spring seems to be ready to jump out from around the corner anytime. Things are sprouting in my garden and I'll be interested to see what they are. I moved here in July last year so missed the spring busyness. I'm guessin' some tulips fo sho :)

Hope everybody has a great weekend and hopefully I can come up with something witty and trenchant tomorrow. Now... not so much :)

day seventysix

I know... the suspense is killing you, right? There were fish and chips (or f apostrophe n apostrophe c apostrophe... vulgar monkeys) and they were TREEEEEMENDOUS. Tasted so ridiculously good. And what a great, fun atmosphere to have them in. The Winch was hoppin', saw lots of friends, super vibe! Had an all 'round superb day.

Knowing I was going to indulge tonight I made a plan, stuck to it and didn't have the slightest amount of guilt. Got up this morning and made a pot of steel cut oats: thanks Les for the raspberry idea... it made all the difference. Did a 45 minute workout, took care of some mom business, then enjoyed the rest of the day cleaning the yard. Fun fact about where I live... random sticks and branches go over the fence onto city property where they blend in just fine.

So the only thing I need to worry about now is the wonderful fish and chips working their way thru my 3 month deep fry clean system. I'm not gonna lie, my tummy she is making funny noises. Sorry if that's TMI but there you have it. Hope you all enjoyed your St Patty's and nobody suffers too much tomorrow :)

day seventyfive

Day seventyfive is actually a  bit of a blur now that I have a sec to sit down and think about it. March break always brings special challenges and Kid's Eat Free Wed. night during March break is pretty much a  recipe for disaster. It wasn't a disaster really but we got that lull that precedes two hours of sustained loopiness. Fun but busy.

Had a terrific surprise at lunchtime when an old friend popped by to catch up. Really tremendous chat :)
Didn't get anywhere near exercise today (if you don't count the running at the restaurant... and I don't) but my hammys are just as pleased. The good news is that yesterday's cravings stayed there (in yesterday) and I had a terrific eating day today. Exciting food related news (well, for me anyway). Mom and I are going to the Winch tomorrow night for St. Patty's and there WILL be fish and chips. Regular readers of the blog know that I've been thinking (obsessing) about these f'n'c since last week some time. Well, I figured that planning ahead is smart business so get in some good exercise, eat smart then hit the f'n'c and truly enjoy them. Can't wait!

With that said: everybody have a grand St Patrick's Day and ENJOY !!!
May you be in heaven a half hour before the devil knows you're dead...

day seventyfour

I have these things that reside in the back of my legs... called "hamstrings" p'haps. Between bowling, 30 minute dvd workout,yesterday's marathon walk and today's 45 minute dvd workout I think I can actually here them screaming. It's a subtle noise but I can hear it none-the-less. OWWWW

Pretty good day today but it's like there wasn't enough food on the planet. To my credit *pats own back* I managed to keep the cravings in check but this is really the first day where I would have eaten ANYTHING. Oh well, hot bath, off to bed and live to wrestle another day.

Going through this process with friends is interesting. Everybody seems to have their peaks and valleys at different times. It's kinda great cuz we can all support each with what that other needs at any given time. My dear TO friend just boosted me up with her latest blog post: sounding so pumped I want to be along for that ride. My dear Hammer friend struggles a bit currently and I'm impressed with her quiet resolve. I might be the luckiest cat around that I am surrounded by these strong, wonderful women... YAY US !!!!!

day seventythree

Spring certainly sprung here in Hamilton today. Glorious !!

A dear friend who lives far away is in town for a little while so we caught up today. I invited her here for dinner and she said, hey if it's nice on Monday shall we grab Vito and go for a walk? Monday came and it was indeed nice. A gorgeous walk along the waterfront trail from Bayfront to Princess Point and back again. Couldn't have asked for a better day! Dinner was yummy and the conversation delightful. Honestly can't think of a better way to end my days off.

Looking forward to moving up one on my Leslie Sansone DVD's (4 fast miles) and tomorrow heralds a return to the pool. Life - she is good :)

day seventytwo

Some Sunday's are just plain ole good days. Once I got over the initial shock of daylight savings there was breakfast with mom, bowling with friend, fantastic sushi and it was still light out. Wicked :)

It being Sunday and all I want to talk about the upcoming week. I'm looking for more of the same :) Steady eating, working out and maybe *fingers crossed* some golf at the end of the week if the weather holds.

Have a great week on your own journey and let's keep on keepin' on !!

day seventyone

I'm not quite sure what happened. I was waiting for the plateau to break (which it did) but apparently there were a couple more pounds hiding there. Eek and woot woot !!

Mellow day today involving laundry, grocery shopping, de-mudding the dog, workout, knitting... general mellowness ya know ? Tried on alot of clothes today ( yeah, my own clothes ) and I'm pretty overwhelmed at how great some stuff looks. Also overwhelming is the notion that some of this stuff plainly does not fit anymore and should not be worn in public... kinda cool.

Thx for the brekkie ideas... bought some frozen raspberries today and I'm looking forward to oating it up. Just a side note: for years I have DETESTED raspberries. Just thought they were blechy. Turns out I now love them with an intensity that knows no bounds. Go figure :)

day seventy

I don't mean to sound flabbergasted each time, but I've been doing this for 70 days... wow.

Good fun at work tonight, nice people for the most part and a lady with an extra dose of crazy right at the end of the night. Good times.

I go into my weekend off with the usual concerns. Can I keep this up on a non scheduled schedule. Feels funny to be wondering about this seventy days in... you'd think I'd have a handle on it by now. Unstructured days will prob'ly always pose a challenge. I think I'll get up tomorrow and do a grocery shop so I can have lots of healthy, yummy things around. Tried steel cut oats this morning. Brown sugar and cinnamon certainly helped the effort, but I think I need some raisins. If you have any steel cut miracles please pass them along.

Off to bed to rest up for a couple of full days... maybe just full of doin' nothin'... I'll keep ya posted.

day sixtynine

Yes, I get it... rain makes things grow... C'MON, my back yard resembles a swamp which means you -know - who resembles a swamp monster whenever he returns from there. Seriously, Creature From the Black Lagoon time.

I'm thinking a bit tonight about the concept not wanting to do something cuz it's "hard". I do this (blogging, eating right, exercising) everyday and I think it's kinda hard but it doesn't stop me. What's the magic line in my brain that says, this is just hard enough so I think I can do it but that over there is way too hard and I'm not even gonna try it. And is it like exercise or playing golf or anything else that you get better at if you practise ? I'm kinda tired and not making much sense. Funny: it made sense in my head when I started :)

One close then days off ... woot woot !

day sixtyeight

Let the bells ring out and the banners fly... the plateau... she is broken !!!! Oh happy day. Thought I was going to be stuck at 10 lbs for the rest of my life. Woot woot is all I have to say.:)

That one thought has so monopolized my entire day that I don't really have anything else to talk about. LOVING the Leslie Sansone dvd's, added wrist weights today just to kick it up a notch and it was super fun.

Out for dinner with mom tonight at the Winch and my heart broke everytime a beautiful plate of fish and chips walked by me. It's pretty weird to think I haven't had anything deep fried for over 2 months. I'm going to have to plan a treat day that seriously involves the Winch fish and chips :)

Keep on keepin on, my friends

day sixtyseven

Not much to chat about tonight. I got back on the exercise wagon today and I feel AWESOME!!

It's really pretty annoying how exercise actually makes you feel better. I mean, I read all these recipes about healthy stuff and I make it and well... it's not always super tasty. Sometimes a calorie reduced thing doesn't taste the same, have the same mouth feel as a full calorie thing. I know it's good for me but occasionally I like my green beans SLATHERED in butter. SLATHERED. I like my popcorn to basically change its molecular whatsis and turn from solid to liquid. I guess I'm saying that the healthy eating doesn't always live up to its billing. But exercise... exercise TOTALLY does. The ubiquitous "they" tell us that exercise will give you more energy, heighten alertness while at the same time mellowing you out. Yep... done and done.

And now, after my full day I'm going to sleep the sleep of the just... and only slightly worry about the plateau I'm hoping to break with tomorrow's weigh in. Send the good vibes kittens :)

day sixtysix

A most excellent today. Stupid busy at work with stuff that didn't involve serving guests. That always frustrates me and makes me laugh at the same time. Not many people understand how I can be "busy" if the restaurant isn't full of guests. Ohhhh, it's easy. I did 5 interviews today and 3 yesterday. It's vaguely dispiriting to know in the first 20 seconds or so that somebody has NO chance. God love 'em. Quick funny : we posted on kijiji for resumes and I guess cuz the e-mail reply address was for Roni some gals thought this is a guy. I think you'd be surprised to see the photos the young ones are attaching to their resumes these days... holy crap !!

Actually got a real dinner in tonight and I feel great. At work too late for Swimfit but I'm closing tomorrow night so I hope to catch a day class.
Onwards and upwards chums... or do I mean downwards :)

day sixtyfive

There's something wonderful about Sunday night. I can feel the promise of the upcoming week. All the things that I think I could have done better last week I get the chance to... do better. Sunday night lets you plot out the perfect week. I'll do this and I'll do that and then I might even do the other thing. Even if you don't get to it, there's still a Sunday night coming up next week where you get to plan a fresh week all over again.

Yes, the promise of Sunday night. Now... I'll wake up tomorrow and it will be Monday morning. Somehow the promise of Sunday night needs to translate into the actions of Monday morning (and Tuesday and Wednesday ... ). So this week's goal is to try to fufill those promises. Drink the water, eat the (right) food, exercise and maybe forgive myself a little if I don't get it exactly right.

Have a great week my friends... I know I'm going to :)

day sixtyfour

Another good calorie burn provided by white knuckle driving. I'm assuming here that the sustained adrenaline rush from driving to the Toronto Airport in the dark, in the rain,going to the wrong terminal (in the dark in the rain), finding the right terminal (dark, rain) then making my way home had to have burned at least a couple calories. On the up side, Friend Sara is home and I bagged some deeelish coffee. (Oh Jamaican coffee, how I will enjoy you before I go to work tomorrow)

Fairly quiet day: looking forward to get back in the "swim" *snicker snicker* of things come Monday. As a regular reader you may be wondering if my ticker is broken. I'm wondering the same thing about my scale :) Next week's goal... SMASH the plateau.

According to something I read on the website I use I have lost the amount of chemical additives consumed by the average American per year. I am headed t'ward a small bale of hay...
Keep on keepin' on y'all :)

day sixtythree

I'm baaaack :)

After an enormous amount of sleep I woke this morning feeling right as rain. Also the blues that have been trailing me for the past week seems to have dissipated. Woot, woot !

Ready to get back in the exercise swing. Got some DVD's that seem interesting and easy. I don't, of course, mean easy in a sense that they'll be easy to do. I mean easy in a sense that they'll be comprehensible. I knew I wanted to add to my swimming with some cardio at home. I figured the easiest way to check them out was online. Holy God: some routines expect you to be National Ballet school trained. The moves are so intricate and fussy... no, no, no. I tried Jillian Michael's 30 day shred as well. The moves were simpler but just too high impact for me. Also, afterwards I felt burning in my Achilles tendon and having ruptured it twice I'm pretty skittish about that particular tendon. So... ready to give up I found these DVD's by this gal called Leslie Sansone which is mostly based on walking. Sign me up.

Gonna start 'em up and I'll keep you posted :)

day sixtytwo

I sit down tonight slightly despondent .The eating is going fairly well but this cold makes me not want to eat at all. I'm a bit of a suck and I give my body what it wants when I'm feeling peaky... today it wanted clementines and not much else.

The reason I'm despondent tho is cuz my exercise has hit the rocks this week. I haven't had the energy to get to my beloved swimfit and I'm grumpy about it. Even my house looks like a small but effective cyclone hit it cuz all I want to do is sleep. I know this cloud will lift as soon as my health perks up a bit,so I'm not super worried but it's certainly what's on my mind tonight. 

So there you have my day in a nutshell : despondent but not defeated :)

day sixtyone

Turns out free beer and ribs and music makes people quite happy. A fun night at work tonight. I'm feeling a bit flu-ey, cold-ey so I didn't really enjoy it as much as I would have liked. Coughed so much that I lost my voice for the beginning of my shift. This made the staff v. happy. (and some of the guests)

I'm a bit peeved at myself for not preparing my day properly. Usually if I'm closing I get a decent dinner in courtesy of my fab cooks. I should have realized it would have been too busy for this tonight... but I didn't. No supper for me but inexplicably a can of Pepsi at midnight. Blah.

Off tomorrow and I'm going to try to hop back onto the positivity train at its next stop. Chooo choooo :)

day sixty

Wow... two months :)

I'm tired and slightly grumpy so I won't bore you with any deep philosophical rants tonight. I bought a new duvet cover and it's bright orange and it makes me happy. See... very simple this evening.

I think laying off the booze for 2 months and then jumping in with both feet is accounting for this longish recovery period, and p'haps the grumpiness.

Sleep now.